arrival at a conclusion | Teen Ink

arrival at a conclusion

November 26, 2019
By Halcyonday PLATINUM, Johnson City, Tennessee
Halcyonday PLATINUM, Johnson City, Tennessee
27 articles 29 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and cry at a funeral? It is because we are not the ones involved."
-Mark Twain, "Pudd'nHead Wilson"

i. return

the child i’m told i used to be

secondarily scared of the dark

impermanence was the bogey-man

slathering coloring-book pages in tape

knowing the sun was a mortal star

feeble and fiery

before i was ever the same 

i visited the graveyard again

colder weather in a warmer season

and wished to visit the graves i had curated

cat, rat, sparrows i’d lost count of

marked with river rocks, pipe cleaners, and youth

my father dug the holes when the shovel was too heavy

and i kept guard for hours

it’s a vegetable garden now

ii. knowledge sought 

a fascinated skeptic that couldn’t help but indulge

mountain lore from withered lips

that won’t be around to keep superstition safe

seeing themselves in the ghosts they wove

like the secrets you told me at the graveyard gates

deliciously devious, being a part of something new

i told myself:

this door has always been haint blue

that jackknife X has always hid in its hinge

i’d never paint over it, sure, and why should i? 

i threw my doubt to the wind like ABC gum out a car window

knowing it would be back around

in a most unpleasant fashion 

and sitting shotgun anyways

just in case it might save me

just in case

iii. coming to terms

it was from far that i idolized life

from its clutches that chinks appeared in its armor

on the last day of the year i had felt before

i left the graveyard alongside the sun

a mossy unease

unseasonably warm

uncovered arms tied in wind

i comforted the wind with a lie:

that i finally understood

i pray i never will

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