I saw Jax in that diner and my first, stupid, instinct was to hide my damn face for some reason. “Um, Lee, why are you hiding…..? Ohhhh. Is that her? From the old photos?” I nodded. It had been six years since they had seen each other or talked, and it had felt like an eternity. Jax turned around and I could completely see who she had become. She had glasses, and light brown hair as opposed to dirty blonde. Her honey brown eyes were still as full of happiness as I had remembered. My breath hitched when we made eye contact and she stopped laughing, the happy in her eyes turning to confusion, sadness, and longing. Sam grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the diner. I felt Jax’s gaze burning into the back of my head.

Later that night, I brought Sam along to Amber’s house to stay the night. “I don’t see why you dragged me out of the diner today. I saw Jax, she saw me and that was it.” “Yeah, but you had a hurt look on your face and so did she. I’m guessing yours was from seeing hers.” “She just looked confused to see me, then hurt, like I was a painful memory. I’ve got to see her again soon though.” We knocked on Amber’s door and were greeted with a teen dressed to go out partying. “I hope you brought what I told you to.” “Better yet, we wore the party clothes under our jackets.” “I’ve taught you well my young padawan Lena.” We laughed and got on our way to the party across town.

We arrived and decided that I’d be the designated driver, which I was fine with since I didn’t drink. We had picked up Lilith and Lorie on the way and once we got inside, the twins and Amber made beelines for the drinks. Sam didn’t drink either, so she stuck with me. We sat down after eating and getting water and just talked with some people I went to middle school with.  After a while, we decided to head out back, check on the girls and dance a bit.

“What do you say we dance a bit? Huh?” “Fine. Just one or two songs though.” “Deal.” I grabbed her hand and pulled her onto the ‘dance floor’. We danced through one song and a slow song came on. “Ugh. This ruins it all.” “Nonsense Sam. Just dance with me. It’ll be fine.” I pulled her back to me and we swayed through the song. The next slow song started and Sam’s eyes widened at something behind me. I turned around, still holding onto Sam and saw Jax watching us dance. She noticed us looking at her and looked down at her phone. “Go talk to her. I’ll sit this out. My feet are killing me.” “You are the literal best.”

I sat beside Jax for a minute before saying hi. “Um, long time no see.” “Oh, yeah. It’s been what...six years? How have you been?” “I’ve been really good. I brought someone back with me from Cali.” I nodded in Sam’s direction. She found a sick Amber and was holding her hair as she vomited into a trashcan. “I saw you two at the diner and earlier on the dance floor. You seem really close.” “Yeah, we are. She was my only real friend over there and helped me open up more. So, how have you been? I see you got that phone finally.” “I’ve been great. Got this thing three years ago for Christmas.” We sat in silence for a few minutes, the party muffled in their far corner of the yard.

“Why didn’t you come back?” I was taken aback by her question and took a moment to process it. “I was going to, but Sam was going through a lot of stuff and I couldn’t just up and leave her.” “But you could just up and leave us.” I looked into Jax’s eyes. They were full of hurt now and I flinched inwardly. “You could stay in California for six years with no problem deciding to stay for one person, but you couldn’t stay here for Amber, Lilith, Lorie or me? Do you have any idea how much I cried the night you left? How many nights I wished to be with you or talk to you? I don’t think it would’ve mattered. You obviously care about Sam more.”

“I’m sorry! But Sam was all that mattered then and now that she’s better and here with me, we can talk again.” “Sam was all that mattered, huh? Do you even care that I’ve loved you since eighth-grade year, and was hurt by not being able to see you for six whole years?” “Y...you loved me?” “Yes! I had always thought that you felt the same and that was why you got closer to me. I let you because I thought, ‘This is it. She finally likes me back. Maybe I have a chance now.’ I guess I was wrong.” Jax stormed off before I could say anything else.

I didn’t tell my friends about the talk. I just told them that we talked and joked for a bit before she had to leave. A few weeks later, I called Jax after Amber gave me her number. She didn’t answer so I left a message, “Hey Jax, this is Lena. I really want to talk, so meet me where it all began at two.” I got to my middle school and waited in the gym after the janitor let me in. (He owed me a favor). Jax arrived right at two and I waved for her to join me in the bleachers.

“I wanted to talk, alone.” “I don’t see why it had to be the gym.” “Well, six years ago, in this gym, on this day, I sat with a girl that was quirky and nice. At 2:15 pm, right in this seat, I looked at this girl and saw how happy she was. I instantly fell for her. I was hurt and upset to leave her after four short months. I just wanted to be with her and be happy with her. I decided that forgetting and moving on would help, but it didn’t until I graduated. I had found another reason to not go back and fix things between us. At 2:15 pm on this day six years ago, I started falling in love with this girl and never stopped loving her.” I had started to cry a little as I spoke and Jax reached a hand up to my face.

“Six years ago, I fell in love with you. Now, at 2:15 pm in this seat, on this day, I’m wondering just how much this girl loved me.” Jax stared at me for a moment before speaking and breaking the silence. “If I were that girl, I’d say that I fell in love with you before we became close. Before that day in this seat. I’d say that I still love you and that I want to be happy with you.”

She wiped the tears off my face and cupped both of her hands around it. “I love you, Lena. I have for a long time and I don’t think I’ll ever stop.” Then, she leaned in, put her lips to mine and there was no more space between us.