Undercover

I scratch my head in frustration, wishing I was anywhere but here. It seems like this is a recurring theme for me during my days at the office. Sitting at my cubicle, caged and confined, face in hand, I watch emails populate my inbox, most of which I immediately delete. Coworkers never seem to understand they do not need to ‘cc’ me when sending needless ‘FYI’s’ for jobs that no one wants to do and never get done. I look over the side of my desk and realize my colleague is fast asleep. I can’t understand how he does it. Perhaps he finds the buzzing of the flickering lights above us soothing. Someone should really fix that. I log on the internet and search “how to improve my life;” not surprisingly I get 278 million hits – everybody has the answer but me. Daunted, I log off the computer, dishevel some files and papers to give the appearance I am hard at work, and stare rather blankly at the mess I just made.

“Sammy” yells one of my coworkers across the grid of cubicles, “want to grab a bite?” I am in no mood to converse over lunch, decline her offer, and remain sulking at the desk contemplating calling in sick tomorrow. Its only Tuesday and my efforts are concentrated on how to shorten my work week with tried and tested schemes. I am still not sure whether it’s the actual job profile I do not like, or whether I am mad at myself for taking employment hastily without carefully considering its impact in the long run. I failed to realize the importance of planning for my career and I am paying the price.

I pull out my sandwich from the bottom drawer of my desk, a slab of roast turkey on stale rye toast; it’s as dry and mundane as my job and suits the occasion. My dissatisfaction with my work is reflected in what I eat, how I dress, and obviously in how I feel.
Halfway through my second bite, I am called to my supervisor’s office. Struggling to swallow the crust of rye, he notifies me I will be training a new recruit who is part of a reality show who will be competing for the chance to win their dream job within the company. I scoff at the thought of this job being a ‘dream’ of any kind… more closely resembles a nightmare. Gritting my teeth through calls upon calls of customer complaints about poor service, hidden fees, excessive costs and the like is not the thing dreams are made of. While I have been successful at what I do because of my sympathy with customers and my retribution at the firm by pushing the customer’s case as much as possible, I am acutely aware I am ill-suited to be working a desk job for an incoming call center. I am as active now as I was in my elementary years, and even more. I avoid thinking about it, because I know the decisions I have made to arrive at my current position have been less than stellar and I deserve to suffer the consequences somewhat.

I realize my boss was still explaining my role to me - most of which I did not hear - having tuned out about thirty seconds into his instructions. I nod in understanding, wondering whether he is aware of how much I despise him. Does he ever consider how much it bothers me when he interrupts me at no other time but during lunch and always when I am in mid-bite? Eager to return to my desk, I grab the new employee’s profile as I exit his office and return to my turkey sandwich. I wipe the crumbs off the desk into the waste bin and browse through the employee’s profile. He is a 56 year old former engineer looking to change his career path by joining business banking client services. I question the logic as it seems rather odd that the bank would even offer an opportunity to someone with his background. I have my suspicions, and decide to call his former employer and enquire whether he even worked there. Surprisingly, the company doesn’t even exist. There is a nail salon that runs the same name, but no evidence of an engineering firm. I quickly realize I am being misled. I ring a colleague in our human resources department and ask about our CEO.

I figure it out… I am on “undercover boss”. The question remains as to whether I should blow his cover or play the game?