It was the day that everything changed when Ben sat in his meadow, the grass tickling his bare feet. His bright blonde hair shone in the afternoon sun, with his young brown eyes staring into the sky. It was his meadow, as he called it, because there was no one else to claim it theirs besides him and his best friend, Snowball. Snowball was a beautiful rabbit, with fluffy white fur and tall ears. They never disagreed, they lived in the moment and loved every second of it. They would always sit and be happy together in the grass, and why shouldn’t they? There was food and water always available, and the ground was very soft. The forest surrounding them stood tall and green. The only thing leading out of where they sat was a small, grassy path, untouched for as long as Ben could remember. But they were happy, there was no reason to leave their place.
One day, Ben was sitting in the dewy grass of the morning, when he heard a sound in the forest. He stood up with a start, no sounds had ever come from the trees before. After a minute or so he figured he was just imagining things, and had started to sit back down when he heard it again. It sounded wispy, like a breeze, except it was as if it were some far off voice trying to speak to him. This time he made an effort to find the source of the sound. He walked around the grass, near the trees on all sides, but it wasn’t coming from anywhere in particular. It emanated from the forest as a whole, just in some far off location. The only way out of the meadow was that path. He had never really considered going down the path, there was no reason to do so before, but then again, no sound had ever come from the forest before either.
He sat for a while. The sound, still lapping at the edge of his consciousness, stirred emotions he couldn’t explain. He looked around the grassy field, and wondered if anything could be beyond this. Could there be more to what he did? He thought about it, there was nothing in the meadow that would harm him, and the uncertainty of the forest was terrifying. If he only went a little ways though, it couldn’t be that bad. He decided that a walk through the forest couldn’t hurt. He gathered supplies, grabbing as many berries as his pockets could fit. Snowball sat there, looking puzzled up at him. He couldn’t leave her behind. Ben took Snowball up in his arm, and started to walk down the path.
He noticed instantly that the woods were a lot different than his meadow. It was very dark as the trees above him closed slowly overhead. The ground changed from the soft grass he loved so much and turned to dirt and rocks underfoot. It was slow going, but if he was ever close to giving up hope, he would hear the sound again, ever louder as he slowly walked further into the woods. He carefully ate the berries. It couldn’t be that much further.
It was barely an hour when his soft bare feet began to hurt. He had walked on the soft grass of the meadow for so long, even a couple steps with the rocks underneath his feet began to take a toll. This was almost his turning point. “Why should I be out here?” He thought quietly to himself. He couldn’t even remember why he came, why should he care if the forest made some noise? Snowball seemed to agree, shivering under his arm. He decided he’d gone far enough. As he turned to head back though, defeated and sore, he heard the whisper in the wind again. It was as if it knew he was turning. Like a shout from some distant mountaintop, he faintly heard the word, “up!” He was thoroughly shocked, and looking up into the branches above, he saw pair of sandals hanging there. He smiled and reached up to grab them. There was some disappointment there for not being able to go back, but surely it wouldn’t be that much further? The voice obviously wanted him to see something. He felt emotion stirring in his chest along with something he hadn’t felt in a while. Hope.
           As he kept walking, the trek became harder and harder. He protected his feet, but the brambles turned to thorny bushes he had to push through. Branches became dangled on the ground, and gnarled roots reached up as if to grab at his exposed ankles. Snowball was shivering violently now. He wrapped her tighter, but he knew it was fear she felt. He felt it too. He couldn’t just leave her behind in that grassy field though, he’d been with just her for so long… As the sun started to set, it was harder and harder to see. For the night, he decided to sit under the tall outline of a maple, Snowball hiding in his lap.
His dream was horrible and vivid. He dreamed his meadow was on fire, and that he sat in the middle of it all as the flames licked the trees that had protected him for so long. The water pools flickered orange and the berries on the bushes popped and burned. He saw Snowball’s body under a burning branch, but he couldn’t move to save her. The trees were full of mocking eyes, but he could hear the voice still. It kept saying for him to wake up, to wake up and leave these things behind. He knew that voice, he’d heard it somewhere before. He was suddenly clutched with fear when he realized it was his own voice. He hadn’t spoken in so long, who was he? He remembered snippets. There’s a park, an apartment in the city. There’s people too, laughing and talking. He’s there now, out of the burning meadow. Why would he need that rabbit now? He did things, learned things, loved things. Didn’t he play an instrument? He’s not a child here, he’s living. There’s places and people, so much to do and so much to see. Out of the corner of his eye he spies her, he sees a girl, the girl. But it all starts to fade as quickly as it came. He can’t see past this haze. He can’t go back to the idyllic dream world he’s been living in, he knew the voice had answers.
Breathing heavily, he awoke in a cold sweat. It was just a dream but he knew he needed to leave. Sitting up, he observed his surroundings. It was almost worse than in the nightmare. The green that was there before had turned dead and rotten, and the ground had grown to a black sand, hot and coarse. He shuddered, and slowly looked in horror at the faces of the trees. The eyes were hollow, they stared angrily down, sneering mouths and jagged noses. He looked at the one he slept against, and it glared back, mouth open in a shrieking gape. They drained all hope from him. That was all he knew as he ran, tears streaming down his face. He’d come so far, and no path was too terrible to bear, but this was too much. Snowball shrieked in his arms. She wanted to go more than him, struggling and panicking under his grasp. They were out of food, he didn’t have any time. The grabbing hands of the trees reached down. If he just kept going... He could see the end, but it was more and more obstructed by groping, dead fingers. He was being smothered, covered from all sides. Branches snapped, he was cut and bruised. Unable to breathe, and surrounded in darkness, he accepted his fate.
The shout shook the forest. It was his voice. It was right there, it was everything he could perceive, it was everywhere, and then, silence. He opened his eyes. The trees stood still, and he sat alone, scratched, bloody, but safe. In a hoarse, unused voice, unused for so long, he called out to the sound that made him leave that grassy field. The sound that had somehow just saved him. He could feel all his willpower gone. He knew the part of him, somewhere out there, calling for him all this time was gone too, spent. He stood up, and looking around. The branches were gone, he was standing on a barren hill. The black sand was thick here, and the sun beat down over head. He remembered again his lack of food, and he looked down at his rabbit, he saw she was dying. Her breathing was weak and unsteady. More tears flowed free and mingled with the blood and dirt on his face. If only he could save her. Desperately, he looked up again. There stood before him a mountain. Scorched bottom to top earth, the ground barren and horrible. He knew that’s where the sound had been. His voice. The mountain itself was a horrible thing, but behind it there was a brilliant glow, and he could hear voices, different ones. They cried out in laughter, love, hate, anguish. It was all there. It was terrifying. He could love it if he could live there he knew, see himself among those people, those people in his dream. He could feel all those feelings too. It was so hard though, it was such a long journey there, and what then? What would he be leaving behind?
He sat and began to remember. He saw the girl again in his mind’s eye. He remembered the night they fell in love. It was so simple. They laughed and joked, they smiled. They had so much to look forward to every day. Time passed, they were happy, but she started not to smile as much. She found it hard to enjoy the things she once did, and it affected their time together. He didn’t know how to help her, arguments took the place of jokes. Frustration, anger, bitterness. He couldn’t help her. She couldn’t help him. He remembered the night he was torn apart, left in shambles, she wasn’t there anymore. It was so hard. He didn’t want to feel the pain, he didn’t want to feel anything. He escaped, he took the easy way out. He’d chosen to forget, to seclude, to not feel. It was so easy to leave it behind. It was then that he looked to his right. There was a small clearing in the woods. It was right there, it would be so simple to walk there. He looked down at the dying rabbit in his arms, his only friend for so long, his friend since he had fled the dark world ahead of him. If he wanted her to live, that was the only option. She wouldn’t survive a trip up a mountain. As he looked at that horrible peak again, the pain flooded through him. He might not survive the trip either. They would only stay there for a night, he told himself. He flung his sandals into a tree, for tomorrow morning, or maybe the next day. As he walked, grass grew beside him, it was so comforting and relaxing. He would go sometime. He would remember. But for now it was so comfortable, sitting in this clearing. If he just sat here it would be easier. It would be all better if he just sat here.
Trees grew thick around him, grass grew tall. It was nothing but him, his rabbit, and sunny afternoons. He was happy, and Snowball was too. It was his meadow, he knew that. There was no one to tell him this wasn’t it, it was just him and Snowball, always there. It was wonderful. Quiet. Peaceful. He’d forgotten what had brought him here, but he didn’t see a reason to leave, especially not down the footpath at the edge of the woods, as it became more and more unused. He popped another small, white pill, and laid his head down to rest. Happy at last.