Today it is Tuesday. I have been waiting for it to be the right day and today is the right day.

I never expected the day to be Tuesday. I wanted the day to be something more spectacular, more memorable somehow, but now that I think of it, Tuesday is the perfect day.

If I picture Tuesday as a person, I can be Tuesday. There's nothing special about the day, no quality that makes you want to get up in the morning and yell, "Hey, it's Tuesday!"

Tuesday's not the weekend that everyone loves, not Monday that everyone grumbles about. It's not Wednesday when people say optimistically, "The week's half over." Tuesday's not even Thursday, because Thursday is almost Friday and it's not Friday, whose natural charm and beauty go without saying.

So now that I've thought about it, Tuesday is the perfect day. I even like the sound of it.

On Tuesday I quit people.

I've been saying it a lot, to myself. I haven't had the opportunity to tell anyone yet, but I will. It will be the only thing I'll ever say to them.

On Tuesday I quit people.

Even in ten years I can say the same thing and it will be true.

I will be on a bus and a woman will ask me for directions and I will tell her that on Tuesday I quit people. She will think that I quit people on the Tuesday that she just lived through and because today is Wednesday, there still might be hope for my rehabilitation.

I am not crazy though, far from it. Quitting people is a very reasonable thing to do, because they aren't good for me.

People are exactly like cigarettes. First, you have to get used to them, then you become addicted and then you find out they're bad for you, so you try to quit.

It should be easy for me to quit because I've never really gotten used to people and I definitely never got addicted. I had to smoke them for a while because I wasn't strong enough to toss them on the ground and grind out their flame with my toe.

Today I am strong enough.

Today is Tuesday.

On Tuesday I quit people.