Her hands were as cold as ice, I held them sitting no more than two feet away from the hospital bed. The room reked of that hospital smell.Sickness filled the air along with sadness. Every day I had seen people die, leaving their rooms with tears filling their families eyes. Sometimes it was people who we had become friends with and sometimes not and although it sounded bad all I really cared about was her. I had come to love every inch of her. The way she smiled at me, the way we fought even if it was fake, and especially  the way she held my hand, the way it felt like she was never going to let go. Even when her hands were ice from the sickness. She was beautiful to me in everyway. The say there's such a thing as Fate, destined to happen, turn out, or act in a particular way. Fate could be the world i’d use to describe that day in the coffee shop.

It was a summers day about 90 degrees with a little breeze coming in from the east. Typically I would never enter a coffee shop on this hot of a day but after getting off of a longs day of work in construction I would've taken anything to quench my thirst. So there I was, I entered the shiny glass revolving doors and approached the counter where I stood behind a girl. I wouldn't have thought much about it except for she told the cashier that she would pay for my drink too saying to me “When you work that hard you deserve a drink.” I smiled and argued the fact that she pay for my drink “It’s really not necessary.” I said but she insisted. Once receiving my drink I noticed that she had sat down at a table with a paper and pen and was writing, I approached her saying “ So since you bought my drink does that mean I can take a seat with you?”  We began talking, I had learned so much about the girl, Halle, I was not one to get involved in any type of relationship but she was different. Maybe it was the way her strawberry blonde hair glistened in the sun, or how her eyes twinkled a beautiful blue color like the stars, or maybe it was that she was smart enough to be studying abroad for 6 months as a pre-med major. One will never know but I am grateful that I sat down that day. We talked till the coffee shop came to a close. I believe that we could have spoke all night but the workers kicked us out once they started mopping the floors. We exchanged numbers that night and little did I know one day I would come to love her as much as I do now.
The next time we met was when she was casually walking down the street. I was working in construction when I saw a wave coming my way.I could help but wonder did she purposely walk down this street to see me? It wasn't very typical for anyone to walk down a road when there was construction cones lining the sidewalk and dust filling the air. I never did find out if she was looking for me that day. One may never know. I was extremely quick to run over to talk to her telling the other guys on the construction sight “ Give me two minutes, i'll be quick.” We talked for five minutes which was well over the time I should have been talking. However, there was something about her that I couldn't pull myself away from. She questioned why I didn't call her that week to ask her on a date. I will never forget how surprised I was when that came out of her mouth. I had never met a girl who was so blunt and to the point like that. Frantically I would never tell her this but I was afraid she wouldn't have said yes or even answered my phone call for that matter. But since she asked I found it an appropriate time to ask. “Halle, will you go on a date with me?” She responded “Of course I will Chase.” she says as her blue eyes meet with mine. To this day I will never know why a beautiful girl like her ever wanted to go out with a guy like me, I had light blue boring eyes and dark brown poop hair, i didn't even come close to her league and everyone knew it around town.
December 6th, 1950, The day we went out to dinner. Upon arriving at Halle’s house I had an outrageous amount of butterflies within my stomach, I had to pinch myself at least a thousand times before getting the guts to knock on her door. Eventually I did it and as soon as I did I got at least a million more butterflies, but it was to late to back out now, the door swung open. She stood before me in a coral colored dress, the top was a lace pattern with a gold belt that long her waist before the skirt dropped and flowed to the bottom of the floor. My eyes lite up in awe. I knew I had to be dreaming she was too perfect for a man like me. Heck I don't even think I was a man. That night we went to Ray’s a italian restaurant that my best buddy owned. “How in the world did you get reservations to this place in such a short time.” she said looking at me. She asked this because it was near impossible to get into ray’s for at least 3 months out. “ I have a very good buddy who is the owner of the place, I guess you could say I have connections. Fortunately he was able to pull a few strings and get us a table.” I said, she smiled, and said “ Wow Mr. Connections.” I smiled back. When we walked in we were greeted by Dylan my best friend, and owner of the restaurant. “Follow me” he explained. We follow but we began extremely confused when we soon found ourselves walking through the kitchen doors until before sat a tiny round table with a tea light candle and sheer white table cloth sitting upon it. A red and pink rose sat in the center with a dim light shining down on them. “Only the best for you.” Dylan said. Halle looked at him and smiled. “ Apparently I should have asked you out before this.” she said. I had no idea what to say, I had never done anything like this before so I laughed quietly and pulled the brown old fashioned chair out from under the table and waited for her to sit down before pushing it in a tiny bit.
We talked the entire night that night until almost one o’clock am before Dylan came in and explained that it had hit that time of night where he must return home. We gathered our stuff and returned to her house in my beaten down white rusted truck. When we arrived I opened the door to the truck, helped her jump down, and, and we once again found ourselves standing at her door. “ You look very dapper tonight in you navy suit.” She said. The butterflies returned, “ You look stunning as well.” I said. I knew I should have done it but the butterflies took over. Sometimes I hated myself for being a shy guy. I didn't mean to be but my mother always explained to me that with only her and I in the house it was hard to not get her personality. My father died when I was just 6 years old. He was in the war and he never came back. Anyway I knew I should have kissed her that night but the butterflies the butterflies.  She thanked me for dinner and just as I thought she was going to walk into her door I found her lips meeting mine. It was like a hundred fireworks had been set off and only me and her existed in that moment. I think the kiss went on for a least a minute. I tried to count but so many thoughts filled my head. Was it possible to love someone this quick? Could she really be this perfect? Why me, why had I become so lucky in that coffee shop? It could’ve been anyone right? Whatever it may have been I was grateful to have met her even if it was just a winter fling. She taught me what love was.
Weeks went by and Halle seemed to appear more than I expected her to after that night, but November 14th, my dreams became a reality. A note from the army saying I was being shipped out to the Korean war. I felt like it was almost a death sentence sense i'd have to leave Halle, it’d have to leave my mother, Dylan, my job, everything. I knew the day I enlisted I would regret it, but you see when I did there was no reason not to. That as Halle and I were walking down the busy road nearly a mile away from the eiffel tower I told her the news. Tears instantly flowed to her deep blue beautiful eyes. I looked at her and cried too. I never cried. Someone had made me cried. I hadn't cried since I was a little boy when my father died. “ Ok” she said wiping away the tears rolling down her face. She grabbed my hand. “ It will be okay, we will make it through. love is something that cannot be taken from people. I Love you Chase” “ I love you too Halle.” I said not even realizing that that was the first time it had come out. We were now standing in front of the Eiffel tower. It was almost if it was a sign. I mean they do say that the Paris is a city of love and so is the Eiffel tower.
The morning of my department came quicker than I could’ve ever imagined. As my alarm clock rang I rolled over to kiss Halle on the forehead before getting up. It had been a wonderful night of love and lust but as the alarm rang and rang I fell deeper and deeper back into reality. I got up stood in front of the mirror and began buttoning up my dark tan coat. The colors of this uniform seemed so ugly to me. Couldn’t they have at least chosen a better color. We did have to wear it everyday of this journey. As I peered over at Halle I saw her eyes slowly began to open as she said to me “ Chase, I am extremely scared for you.” I went and sat over on the bed grasping her hand in between mine. “ Don't you remember, love is something that no one can take from us? We will make it through this, one term and then i’ll be home.” She kissed me and quickly put on one of my baggy old sweatshirts and a pair of sweatpants which had the tiniest of holes just below the pocket. We went on our way to where I would leave to fly on a plane. When we got there we both agreed that it was much easier to just say a quick goodbye than to pretend like I wasn't going to leave. We said goodbye gave a tiny kiss and hug and off I went.
As we took off I looked at the two pictures she had given me, one was a pictures of two of us. Twas the night we had dinner on a boat. She had planned the date this night and i'll never be able to forgive myself for letting her pay that evening but she insisted. She wore a red dress that night. It had a deep v in the front and puffed at the waist. Her lips were painted in a deep red mat color and her hair tied up with numerous large curls pinned in swirly formations. God she was beautiful. I wished I could go back to that night. Wished I could hold her hand again. Wished I could kiss her ever so soft lips again. It had only been about 2 hours now and I already missed every last inch of her so much that I felt as though I could die already.
Now as the journey to the base was about half over, 6 hours in, I decided to close my eyes and save the other picture for later sense it wasn't really to my use right now, if you know what I mean... I closed my eyes to fall asleep but so many thoughts roamed through my head. Would she be okay? What would happen when she went back to school? What would happen when she couldn't see me? Would she ever wait this long for me? 2 years was the minimum term and although that goes fast in the everyday life it was about to be one of the longest journeys in my entire lifetime.We wrote to each other as much as we could but a letter was no wear near the same as seeing the beautiful smile plant along her face each time she saw me,it was no wear near the same as lying in bed with her. it just wasn't, and what I never knew is it would never be the same.
I remembered the way he used to look at me, but two years that was a long time for a girl. I tried to tell myself I loved him but how could I love someone who was so far away, who’d i'd only known for such a short period in my life. Maybe it was just the tendencies I had. I always pushed people away. When things get hard I just turn away, in my world it makes things so much easier. That night I returned to Dylan’s restaurant to speak of my problems and as we sit there I never realized how much he cared for me. As the night came to an end he offered to walk me home and I accepted sense it had gotten very late. On the walk home he walked very close to me but I never thought anything about it until the next time we met.
As we lay in the bed, Dylan and I, I couldn’t help but want to cry. What had I done? what was I going to tell Chase? I had just committed one of the biggest sins in the bible. I was supposed to marry Chase and now what. Did I love Dylan? No of course not. He got me at a vulnerable time. The biggest thing I couldn't understand was how would Dylan do such a thing to his best friend.
It was only ten days before Chase would come home and I wrote my last letter. 
Dear, Chase
Letter Number 245,
Hi, I suppose that’s how I feel I should start this letter. I love you Chase and I cannot wait until you come home in nine days but yet I dread it. You may be asking why and I will tell you but I first want to remind you of all of the good times we had. The time when we rode the ferris wheel to feel like kids again, the time when we talked down the streets of Paris together and ended up in front of the Eiffel tower after walking for nearly 3 hours, the time we ate dinner together in bed, and especially the time when we wrote fake wedding vows, and then the time we we lost it to each other. Something that we will cherish for the rest of our lives. All those times that you put a wonderful smile on my face or made me get butterflies because you were just you. This thing that I did... you will never forgive me. Remember that letter that you wrote me that spoke about the book you were reading. Oh what was it called “The Scarlet Letter” Yes well I should now sew the letter A onto all my clothes. I am sorry for my sins chase but two years is a long time. I have lost all respect for myself and I cannot imagine how you are feeling right now. If you choose to keep reading I will tell you how it happened, if not I am impeccably sorry and I hope one day you can forgive me. The time that I wrote to you about going to Dylan’s restaurant to speak of things. That night he walked me home after having numerous drinks. When arriving at my apartment he walked me up to the bedroom to ensure that I would be alright getting up the stairs. You know how wine makes me incredibly tippsy. When getting up there I didn’t think much about it until I found him removing my pants. I will spare you the rest of the details. If you will ever forgive me I may never know because tonight I will do something that you will not be able to stop. I hope Dylan gets what he deserves for taking advantage of me that night but Here’s to our ever lasting love.
With sincere gratitude,
Halle
I placed the envelope into the mailbox and put up the red flag so that they would know to send the letter. I walked up the many steps of my apartment and came turned into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror, and thought this is not me.Who have I become? I opened the cabinet to grab the medication leaving the tiniest fingerprint on the mirror. I grabbed out 13 and took them all. It all went black after that. I felt like things were closing in on me. I deserved it though at least I would clear myself of my sins.
The next time I woke up it was in a hospital bed, my hands cold as ice. He sat beside me, but how he was home nine days later. He later explained that they let him come home early and he had found me in my apartment. I was nothing but overjoyed that he was home until I realized that meant he didn't get the letter. I wondered if I should tell him, but I decided not to break something that wasn't broken. He was home, I closed my eyes and dreamt of the coffee shop.