Like most misery, it started from apparent happiness. 

A story of cosmic irony. 

- Emperor Shang Tang

She was a crystal lotus with delicate pink petals and she fell in that same cream hue. 

I am not cruel. I only did what had to be done.

The girl didn’t live in a harmonious piece in the resurrecting history; it was one with rampage, inequality seeping through every speck of dirt.

Today, I will tell you the story of a girl who didn’t deserve the script I gave. I personally don’t believe it to be a tragedy, although it is evocative to my bleeding conscious. I remember that single lotus.

“Go find ShangTang. I will go to the royal sacrifice temple to pray for your father. Your father died honourably on the battlefield. I wish the best for him,” the girl’s mother’s tender voice told her. Her mother had a smile on her face that made her reminiscent even with the tear marks that sat almost permanently on her face and dimmed eyes. 

“Wait for me, little flower, I’ll come back like always. Be patient and believe,” was her father’s last words before he was announced dead. Two weeks ago, her father had disappeared. All traces of his presence were wiped from this earth. It was funny to think he was a seemingly immortal general that all soldiers looked up to. 

“Yes mother,” She replied stiffly. If the girl had looked closer, she would’ve seen the determination, rebellion and a tint of madness in her mother’s eyes; that her mothers’ once black and white tears were red, then I wouldn’t have taken her away. And her life wouldn’t have been so pitiful. I’m harsh with the pen. An important note before I continue the story, the girl wore a white dahlia dress with a rose loose belt and in her hand was a pale pink lotus that was just too sweet.

Fu-Ling walked from the gate through a narrow pathway entirely made of tiny pebbles. The narrow path had personally been made by Fu-Ling and ShangTang a little over a year. She wished time can rewind, she would’ve wanted to stay in that moment forever.

Then, she reached a livelier part of the palace. It was called ‘暮梦堂’ - the paradise in the dream at twilight - named by the emperor. It was the part of the palace that was built for ShangTang, he was the first male born with noble blood in the generation. 

“FuLing!” 

The girl turned to see him and showed her first smile since her father’s death. “Don’t shout in such a holy place.”

“It’s not that holy. I’m always here,” ShangTang replied breathily as he looked to the girl he’d always thought to have been perfect.

“You’re the emperor’s nephew. You’re special.”

“Come on. Don’t be solicitous. There’s a lot of fish today in the north pond! I even prepared your favourite fishing rod and the special blue bucket, just for luck.”

“Look. ShangTang’s all grown up.”

“Don’t tease me. I’m a year older than you, 14, an age to get married soon. My dad’s already talking about choices,” he replied wiggling his eyebrows.

“Is he now? Who does he have in mind?” FuLing asked, her eyes twinkling.

“Someone pretty, smart, and is currently wearing a white dress standing next to the most perfect man in the world.”

“You flatter me but isn’t humility a virtue for a so-called ‘man’?”

“No way. Fortune favours the bold. Don’t you think?” 

She chuckled lightly, sauntering after ShangTang as she bent to collect fresh orchids to make a flower wreath for her mother.

“You didn’t come today to visit did you?” ShangTang asked slowly.

“No. Are you cold?” Her smile slipping off her face.

“A brave woman shouldn’t avoid talking about what is feared.” The girl didn’t respond. “Is everyone, okay?”

“No,” she choked out. “My father disappeared. He was ordered to calm a riot by the royal decree.”

“Yet you sit here as if—”

“No matter what I think or do, it won’t change reality. No one cares how I feel. Do you know that this riot had almost a thousand more civilians that those in my dad’s battalion? It was not a decree of honour, it was a decree of death,” Fu-Ling replied in a forced calm tone as she scrutinized and glared at the orchid in her hand. 

“Do you blame him, the Emperor?”

“Blame. It’s no use. Dad told me to be patient and have faith. He’ll come back, eventually. He always keeps his promises,” her voice was hopeful but it’d cracked. She was so desperate to believe, but she had nothing to cling to, nothing to help her believe.

The silence was heart-wrenching and full of despair, without a wisp of hope that might have been dangling a couple of minutes ago.

“We should-”

“You are an island of solitude with waves threatening to kill you as you hath no pity nor mercy. You killed my husband. Matter not if emperor, whether surrounded by gold, if it is not I who plunges a knife to you today, it will be by another—” 

Fu-Ling recognised that voice although she’d never heard it used so aggrievedly. It suddenly all made sense, staying away from the main hall, her mother’s sudden change in mood, so she ran. Fu-Ling ran, the path to the main hall never felt so long. Her heartfelt like steel against an anvil; she ran. A realisation had never been so painful; she ran. And Shang Tang followed. 

This was the last chance I gave her. And she completely missed it.

Her mum was kneeling on the floor struggling to get free of the ropes that held her down as the Emperor sat on that raised golden seat with an unreadable composture. A bloodied knife sat on the stair.

“By the royal decree, Fu Gua Yi is sentenced to death for high treason, attempted murder to the emperor. Her daughter and only relative-”

“Mother!”

Everyone turned around. They saw the girl, standing by the door. To me, she seemed out of place; blood was everywhere. 

“FuLing? What are you doing here? Go!” The once calm voice turned frantic. Her mother tried to stand and reach out to her as if her current situation was forgotten only to be held down once again. 

The girl didn’t move. 

She felt the lotus in her hand darken.  “Mother. I want to stay with you.” 

Her youthful naivety seems to have escaped. “I have something to say, my Emperor.”

FuLing’s voice trembled only the slightest as she looked to the Emperor. He raised his eyebrows.  And the lotus in her pocket turned dark red, but yet it bloomed.

This is the last time the two children will ever meet again, the girl knew but the boy did not. The Emperor had bargained with the girl. She’d done enough. 

She told the boy that she was going to exile, that she bargained with the Emperor and he gave mercy. 

“ShangTang, my leave will only be a drop in the ocean. Shine bright. Make sure your light is still visible no matter how far I go.” 

There was no crying. She’d done enough of that. 

FuLing died the next day. She flung herself off a cliff to avoid the taming knife. She wanted to bleed red lotus, not steel. 

At that second, she was no longer glass, she was a diamond.

Her white dress was red. 

ShangTang will grow to become the rise of a new dynasty, Emperor ShangTang. He let his hurt empower him to become light and not hate. 

I believe I have accomplished my job well. Remember, I’m no villain, only an author.

As Fate, I will tell you her bargain. She was punished to death by the Emperor. However, was given a chance to say goodbye; a forever goodbye. She lied to ShangTang about her sentence. She didn’t want her last decision, last choice to be for him to live in despair. She waned him to have hope while she gets drowned in those ceaselessly born back fateful currents.

She’d fall like the petals of the lotus with that same cream hue.