Ahhhh, I exhale. I lay in bed, my body sinking into the soft mattress. I stare at the stark white blank ceiling. Thoughts run through my head like cars on a highway. All of the thoughts are dormant and uninteresting but as soon as I start to drift off into a light sleep. I see a loud and boisterous motorcycle flying down my highway heading straight for my conscience. I try to stop it but it is too quick. My brain feels like it is being pulled into a whirlpool of sadness and sorrow. Then I am back there in my old apartment sitting at the dinner table with my daughter. She looks across the table at me and her voice seems to pierce my soul. “Why did you leave me?” She asks. A lump has not formed in my throat and I cannot make out any words. My daughter then waves her hand and I am back at the park. The park where I had left her on the swing set many years ago. She was all grown up now but she never forgave me for that moment. I feel the motorcycle driving away from my brain and back to a cold place I hope it never returns from. I sink deeper into my now sweat soaked mattress. As I drift off to sleep my daughter still rings in my head with the simple question of “Why did you leave me?”.