More Than Fine | Teen Ink

More Than Fine

September 27, 2013
By TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories


She was sitting at her desk looking at nothing in particular. Her eyes were lost and yet there was a smile pasted on her face. Her hair was open as always and her hands tense. The smile was still there. If you saw her you may feel she is chirpy, a little over the average weight, friendly, and that she doesn’t worry. I quietly enter the classroom and sit beside her, she ignores me. I really like her; so much that I follow her, not in the creepy way, but in a normal ‘hey we are friends’ way.
She looked at her friend, Mia,and waved. I wish she accepted me as she did other people. She went on to tell her friend about yesterday, gossips, and ‘stuff’. I am sure she left out some parts. Some things that only I know about her, I am sure she didn’t tell her friend that she locked herself in the washroom and cried, also that she roamed around alone because she thought people in her life were too controlling and not understanding. She probably didn’t tell Mia that her parents fight a lot and she cries herself to sleep while hugging her pillow, maintaining her nonchalant attitude she also maybe didn’t tell her friend how her falling grades concerned her and her heart broke every time she saw in people’s eyes their surety of her failure. She may also have kept the fact that she wanted to stop being this person, that she wanted to not falter while speaking, that she pushed her tongue on her gums to control her tears as she wasn’t a public display of emotions kind of a person. She also didn’t tell how increasingly difficult it is getting to stop her from bawling, that she is getting weaker and she sees no one’s pity but only their disdain. She feels like she is drowning in a pit looking for salvation. She can’t see the light.
She probably also left the part about her falling hair, which was why she kept her hair open, to hide her bald spots. She didn’t tell her friend that she was overweight because of thyroid. She left the part in which she doesn’t eat, where blackness elopes in front of her eyes and she falls, crashing her head. She doesn’t tell anyone that she can’t study because she has no concentration as she is too weak, that her mind creates a virtual barricade for information. She never told her friend that now she has to stop doing her favourite activity, reading, that now she can’t even watch T.V as the pain in her head is unbearable. She never told anybody but wishes they knew, so that she could have an excuse. She smiles, tells her friend about how Jennifer made out with Caleb. She is there between those people, so near yet so far.
There are some things only I know about her and yet she fears me. She doesn’t ever face me and I still search for her, in every second of my existence. I quietly enter her, she doesn’t realize. Now at least she has a soul.


The author's comments:
This is for everyone who is a silent, solitary sufferer. You're not alone. Even though you think you are.

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This article has 12 comments.


on Dec. 13 2014 at 2:42 pm
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thankyou Snigdha <3

on Dec. 13 2014 at 2:42 pm
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thanks so much Vyom :D

on Oct. 11 2013 at 11:47 am
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thank so much Shagun!

on Oct. 11 2013 at 11:39 am
BurrThistle GOLD, Jaipur, Other
10 articles 0 photos 161 comments

Favorite Quote:
Write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect

Okay, number one - intensly heartfealt and vividly described Number two - I love how so many diffenrt emotions swirl in this piece of literature Great Work, Keep it up  

SnigdhaR said...
on Oct. 6 2013 at 10:41 am
I loved it. It makes you want to actually appreciate how vast and endless life is. You nailed it, seriously.

on Sep. 30 2013 at 11:17 am
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thanks so much Christie! I am working with my fiction writing skills! :)

on Sep. 30 2013 at 11:15 am
Christie99 BRONZE, Washingtonville, New York
2 articles 4 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Dreaming is not Achieving....Achieving is pursuing the Dream - Christine S.

I loved how you really described what whats happening. its as if I can really submerse myself into the story. A++ lOVED IT BRAVO

Vyom said...
on Sep. 30 2013 at 10:52 am
Great going Tanvi. I have read other writings of your as well and I must say they are all good :)
Keep it up!

on Sep. 30 2013 at 10:51 am
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thankyou so much Vball for reading my work and also for posting feedback! Appretiate it!

on Sep. 29 2013 at 8:21 pm
vballgirl99 BRONZE, Atalnta, Georgia
1 article 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Practice makes perfect&quot;

This was so heartfelt! I felt as if I could really understand what she was going through because of your perfect details

on Sep. 29 2013 at 2:09 pm
TanviKusum DIAMOND, Gurgaon, Other
89 articles 4 photos 197 comments

Favorite Quote:
All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. <br /> Orison Swett Marden<br /> <br /> &quot;The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say.&quot; - Anais Nin<br /> <br /> we speak in hushed voices so as to not wake our memories

Thanks so much Hitesh! :)

Hitesh BRONZE said...
on Sep. 29 2013 at 1:21 pm
Hitesh BRONZE, New Delhi, Other
3 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.&rdquo; <br /> ― Oscar Wilde

A beautiful article with wonderfuldescriptive analsis of every emotion <3 love it!