“Mommy, I want to go to the park.” I craned my neck to see my daughter Sydney looking at me with her big brown eyes. Her blond hair shone in the morning sun. I felt my heart swell with happiness. Sydney was my love, my life and my world. I couldn’t resist her. “Okay sweetie, let’s go.”

The park was deserted. I felt uncomfortable and somehow scared. “Baby we have to hurry, we have to go the mall.” “Okay mommy, just let me have one slide.” I nodded and Sydney ran towards the slide. I felt nervous and jumpy. I kept looking here and there expecting something to jump out and grab me. “Get a grip!” I scolded myself. “You’re acting like a scared squirrel.” But I still felt as if something bad was going to happen.

I was jerked out of my thoughts when I noticed that I couldn’t here Sydney playing anymore. Fear gripped my heart. “Sydney!” I shouted fearfully. “Sydney where are you?” I started searching frantically. Then I saw her.  My heart stopped. She was running behind her ball, unaware of the speeding car that was heading her way. A scream froze in my throat. Then it happened. The car collided with my baby’s little figure.

I ran towards her. Her little arm was twisted in such a gruesome way.  There was a lot of blood. My mind went blank. “Please someone help me!” I cried. Someone gripped my elbow and tried to pull me away. I kicked and struggled trying to break free. The last thing I remember was hearing the ambulance arrive. Then everything went black.

‘A dream;
“Mommy I love you.” said Sydney, looking at me with her big brown eyes. She was dressed completely in white. She looked like a beautiful angel. “I know baby, I love you too.” I said hugging her. “Mommy I have to go now.” I heard Sydney say. Then she started to fade. “Goodbye mommy.” Her voice faded. “NO! Sydney come back.” I ran after her but she was gone. Suddenly I was surrounded by darkness. I felt empty and then I fell into the dark void from which I was never to return.’

I woke up screaming.  Gasping and panting, I tried to catch my breath. After calming myself, I saw that I was in some kind of a hospital room. “Oh no, this really can’t be happening!” I said remembering all that had happened.
I jumped off the bed and ran outside. I saw a nurse walking past me. “Please help me. My daughter was hit by a car; please tell me where she is.” My voice shook and my eyes filled with tears.  The nurse looked at me with pity in her eyes. She just nodded and told me to follow her.

I followed her into the operation theatre. I saw my baby lying there completely lifeless and something died inside me. I suddenly felt empty and alone. I stepped forward in a daze and went to sit beside Sydney. I heard the doctor say something, but the words were muffled. My sorrow was incomparable to anything I had felt before. But no tears came; instead I sat there silently grieving for my lost child.

Sydney looked so peaceful and happy that it made my heart ache. I just sat there gazing at her. Now I would never hear her laugh, I would never see her smile, never see her pretty face light up with excitement, she was really gone. Now the tears came easily. I cried until there were no tears left. I just sat there, helpless.  Sydney was never to return, and my life had become an empty void.