It had been an awfully hard year. Around February, my parents lost their jobs in the recession. They got themselves minimum wage jobs to ensure our survival. All of our savings went into paying off the mortgage for our house. We were barely getting by and a few months later things got worse. My aunt passed away in an unfortunate plane crash. That's when my grandma moved from my aunt's house to ours.
The whole year had been incredibly painful and I couldn't wait for the calamitous year to end.

It was a cold December night and both of my parents were out working on Christmas. It didn't really matter as we didn't celebrate the holiday but I still wished they had stayed home instead. I spent the entire day nagging my elder brother even though I knew he couldn't do anything to fix the situation.

After dinner he suggested, that me and my grandma join him to watch a movie. I sighed and unwillingly agreed after a little persuasion from my grandma. We sat down on the couch and I thought to myself that the year was almost over and maybe things could only get better from there. Little did I know that it was only the calm before the storm and I was about to suffer the biggest loss yet.

We were halfway through the movie when my grandma suddenly started seizing. Panic-stricken, I looked at my brother and he ordered me to call an ambulance but it was a holiday and the ambulance wouldn't get there soon enough. So, my brother frantically carried my grandma to our run down car and I got in the backseat. He started driving and I held my grandma's hand with tears streaming down my face. My brother tried to stay as levelheaded as possible but I could see him slowly losing his mind. We were a block away from the hospital when he mindlessly hit a car in front us.

Police cars and ambulances rushed to the scene immediately. We weren't severely injured and thankfully neither were the people in the other car. The paramedics got my grandma into an ambulance and I looked back to call my brother but I couldn't see him. I went along with my grandma and I couldn't really comprehend what was happening. An hour later, my grandma stabilized and I asked the doctor if she could find out where my brother was. She told me that he had been arrested for reckless driving and she tried to console me but I just felt helpless. My parents reached the hospital soon after and they were devastated as well.

Needless to say, we couldn't afford to pay his bail and he was stuck at jail. I visited him a week later and that was the last time I saw him. He had been dirty, hungry and completely without hope. I still remember that look of despair on his face.

The social worker in charge of him said that he was out picking trash on the highway for his community service and that was the last time anyone saw him. His jail-mates say a weird man  stopped by and offered him some sort of deal and he unhesitatingly accepted it. Fate had been terribly cruel to us and for him, now there was a chance of a new life.

I didn't blame him for what he did but my parents still hold a grudge. At that point, I no longer felt anything and I was out of tears. As tragic as it sounds, I've been absurdly numb ever since. We no longer speak of him at home. I've just always hoped that he's well wherever he is. I try not to dwell on the past, so I don't think about it often but that face in the crowd I saw today took me back to that eventful Christmas.