Sin: The Final Words of a Girl Lost in Herself | Teen Ink

Sin: The Final Words of a Girl Lost in Herself

December 3, 2015
By SavannahJ GOLD, Cazenovia, New York
SavannahJ GOLD, Cazenovia, New York
16 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"time you enjoy wasting was not wasted" -john lennon


It all feels like it's crashing down upon me, suffocating me slowly, torturing me and laughing as I am crushed under the weight of it all. And yet so me how I am still standing as strong and straight as I can, becoming the support of those around me. I keep my secrets and give my sympathies to others and watch as my own life falls apart in front of me. I put a false smile on my face and make sure my eyes shine bright with a false sense of contentment. On the outside they see a happy, intelligent girl with a bright future and nothing to worry about. But on the inside I am being choked until one day I will stop breathing all together, and I will end in anxiety and sadness, because I have placed the shattered pieces of my heart together for the ones around me, so that I'm not just another thing to worry about. You see, I am dying, and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I can only watch as the pieces of my heart slowly fall apart again and one day I will be so drained I can't put them back together, and I will lie in agony as it explodes inside of me and takes me away into a new world. The pain of others is added to my own, and I take theirs with me as it pierces my skin from the inside and rips me apart where I cannot see it. I have hoped for a long time that everything will turn out okay, and that I will be set free. I have put my faith in lies, and for that I will pay. Perhaps I am living in my own personal hell, the one that I have created around myself with not only my own pain but my friends, as well. So before I let myself fall away, I wish those around me the best of luck with their lives. Live it to the fullest, because I didn't, and look where I ended up.



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This article has 1 comment.


Tu Papa said...
on Jul. 25 2016 at 10:54 am
What a powerful description of how we can feel when life becomes centered on the needs of others. I've taken to using a mantra that helps me see myself for who I really am. "You are the sky...Everything else? It's just the weather." I hope your weather is clearing, but no matter what, you are a beautiful sky.