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Breathe
The storm whipped through the trees outside as she huddled deeper into her quilt. The wind howled, making the shutters creak and slam against the house. Fear coursed through Emily’s veins. However, the storm was not the cause of her panic, it was something much deeper.
Emily couldn’t exactly see what she was afraid of, but she could feel it. Oh god, could she feel it. It was as if a cloud of impending doom settled itself in her room. Stretching its dark mass into each shadowed corner, suffocating her. Logically, Emily knew she wasn’t in any danger, but that fact didn’t help in the slightest. It only invalidated her, making her feel like she was going mad.
A weight in her chest made it hard to breathe, like her lungs were slowly being filled with cement. Ice crept fluidly through her veins, freezing her blood in its place. Other than her shallow breaths, and the occasional growl of thunder, everything seemed to be silent. Emily glanced at her clock, 2:47. She couldn’t take it anymore.
Not bothering to grab shoes, or a coat, she headed downstairs. The sound of the front door unlocking had gotten her dog’s curiosity.
“Be a good boy,” she spoke softly, scratching him behind the ears as he approached her. She opened the door only enough for her to get out, and closed it behind her quickly, as to not let the dog out. Emily headed down the street, all the way to the park.
Emily’s mind swirled with dark thoughts. They clung to her brain, clogging her mind with their black tar, and fogging the corners of her vision with their soot. The swing’s chains creaked under her as she slowly pushed herself back and forth. Her feet hardly even left the ground. She never made her own decisions is life. Nothing ever seemed to go right. It was as if everything had begun to go down hill since her birth. She couldn’t take it anymore.
Emily’s heart knocked against her chest, loud and rapid, as she slowly walked away from the sad, little park. She stepped into the road, headlights shone into her eyes. The blaring of a car horn, and the screeching of tires filled her ears, but it sounded distant. It was like she wasn’t even there.
The first time in her life she was able to breathe freely, was when her breaths finally stopped.
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This piece is actually about anxiety, and what it feels like. I deal with anxiety myself, but writing helps.