January 11, 2003, was a pivotal day for James Ericson. He had just broken up with his girlfriend of five months, Karen Johannesburg, and he was absolutely devastated. He ended their relationship after he had discovered that she had, for the past month, been cheating on him with his close friend, Hector Benjamin. Now, James was waiting at Blue Brook, a small stream in his hometown, to speak with Hector, ready to end another relationship.
        James was a seventeen-year-old junior at the Huckleberry School in Charlevoix, Michigan. He had short, blond hair and blue eyes and wore a New York Knicks beanie everywhere he went, for he was born in Manhattan. He was five feet, nine inches, tall, but he weighed only one hundred fourteen pounds. He had always received good grades and was a perennial honor roll student.
        But James’s mind was in turmoil. After walking out of his pre-calculus examination feeling very confident, his teacher notified him that he had failed, bringing his semester grade down to a B-. Additionally, he had lost his grandmother, with whom he was very close, to lymphoma on New Year’s Eve. His changed personality frightened some of his dearest friends when he returned to school, and many of them began to distance themselves from him. Hector was one of these friends, and James was now at the moment where he would permanently distance himself from him.
        Hector arrived at Blue Brook with an arrogant air. He was wearing his Chauncey Billups Detroit Pistons jersey, pretending to shoot baskets while skipping down the path to the brook. James found it evident that Hector was unaware of James’s anger and disappointment. He realized that Hector had no idea where this meeting would lead.
        “Did you see the game last night, Jimbo?” Hector asked excitedly, “The Pistons beat the Hornets in overtime! I keep telling you they’re better than your Knicks!”
        “Cut it, Hector,” James said, “I know about you and Karen, and I feel extremely betrayed.”
        “What? You mean your girlfriend Karen? What kinds of false rumors did you hear?”
        “I saw you two kissing right here last week. I wanted to believe that what everyone told me was not true, but I saw it for myself. The fact that you’d try to lie about this makes me feel better about my decision.”
        “What decision?” asked Hector.
        “I’m done being your friend,” said James, sounding calm while concealing his anger. “I can’t deal with you making my life a living hell anymore. This is junior year, and I already have enough to worry about. I can’t have so-called friends like you jeopardizing my future. I think you should go.”
        “How dare you!” exclaimed Hector, “I’m the one who has stayed by your side for the past week after all of our other friends ditched you!”
        “Come on, Hector. Don’t pretend that you haven’t followed them,” James retorted.
        “You know what, James?” said Hector with tears falling down his face. “I made one mistake, and you want to end our entire friendship because of it. If you can’t realize how great of a friend I’ve been to you for the past seven years, then maybe you’re right. Maybe all of this was a mistake.”
        And with that, Hector stormed off, leaving James alone in the cold weather that suburban Michigan had to offer in January. He felt frozen in his place, for he had just let go of what had been an integral component of his life for the past seven years. He wanted to cry and release all of his repressed emotions, but it was his newfound cold demeanor that kept him from doing so.
        James could not stay long, for he had an appointment with a psychologist, Dr. Nelson Gregory. His parents planned this meeting directly after James had lost his grandmother. However, James’s anger had swelled by this time after his failing grade, his breakup with Karen, and his termination of his friendship with Hector, all contributing to his deteriorated mental state. They hoped that a visit to this doctor would allow James to recognize his depression and come back home as the boy they had always loved.
        James arrived at the psychologist’s office at around 11:30 AM. He looked at the door to his office, and on it was a passage from the Bible, which read, “Hebrews 13:16 ‘Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.’” This puzzled James, for he assumed that a psychologist would keep religious faith out of his reasoning with patients. Nevertheless, James did not give this much more thought. He opened the door and found the doctor sitting in a blue armchair.
        “Ah, James,” Dr. Gregory started, smiling invitingly, “I’ve been expecting you. I’m Dr. Nelson Gregory, but you may call me Nelson. Please have a seat on the couch.” He extended his hand toward a blue couch. Everything in this cramped room seemed to be blue.
        Dr. Gregory wore a blue button-down shirt and beige khaki pants and had a blue handkerchief in his shirt pocket. He was a tall man with glasses and short, gray hair. While Dr. Gregory was sitting himself down in his armchair, James noticed a gold chain with a cross around his neck. Before he could think much further about this, Dr. Gregory started to talk to him.
        “So, James, your mom and dad have told me that you’ve been having a rough time ever since your grandmother passed away.”
        James was now ready to tell all.
        “Nelson,” he started, “My whole life has been in shambles. My beloved Granny died just weeks after she told us that her cancer was easily treatable. A few days later, I got back to school and found out that I had failed my math exam. Now my A- has been brought down to a B-, which has killed my GPA. I found out that my girlfriend, Karen, has been cheating on me with my best friend, Hector, for a month, and I have just ended my relationships with both of them.”
        “It sounds like you are going through a very difficult time, James,” said the doctor in a soothing voice, “But I am here to help. Tell me, James, what are you feeling?”
        “I feel trapped,” James said, keeping the tears from coming out of his eyes, “I feel drowned in an abyss of sorrow. I should have talked more to my Granny. I should have studied more for my math exam. I should have been a better boyfriend to Karen. I should have been a better friend to Hector.”
        “James, we can’t live our lives in the past,” said Dr. Gregory. He noticed that James’s New York Knicks beanie remained on his head.
        “Think about it in terms of sports. Take basketball, for example. A guard can’t just mope around after he misses a three pointer. He has to think about getting his players the ball so they can make their shots. The most important play in the game is the next play. Likewise, instead of dwelling on what you can’t fix, you need to think about the future.”
        This did not satisfy James. His parents had already told him this after he had failed his pre-calculus examination.
        “Thank you, Nelson,” he started, “This is all very helpful, but may I please use the restroom before we go any further into this?”
        “Of course, James. Go down that hall, and it’s the second door on the left.”
        James rose to exit the room, but as he got up, a folded sheet of paper fell out of his coat pocket. James shuddered upon realizing this. Dr. Gregory approached him. Seeing his anxiety, he put his hand on the boy’s shoulder and told him to remain calm and that he could trust him. He picked up the piece of paper, unfolded it, and began to read. Within seconds, Dr. Gregory realized that he was holding a suicide note.
        Upon this disturbing recognition that was all too familiar to him, Dr. Gregory looked James in the eye, keeping his hand on his shoulder, and said calmly, “It’s a good thing you came to see me.”
        James took a seat on the couch, and Dr. Gregory sat down next to him, keeping his hand on his shoulder, as he could see that it seemed to comfort him. James, trying desperately not to cry, said, “In the span of less than two weeks, I’ve managed both to turn my friends against me and to terrify my parents, and now there is not a day where I don’t want to say goodbye to the tempestuous storm of my own conscience.”
        “James,” the doctor started, “There are many small mistakes we can make in life that we can recover from, but if you commit suicide, there is no next play. It cannot be forgiven.”
        “Forgiven?” James asked with evident confusion.
        “Did you see the quotation on my door? I talk to children who are lost and think that the answer to what they believe is a hopeless dilemma is to leave it all. But this is not what God wants. It is He who decides when we all die, and it is He who knows our fate. Going against Him is the one thing that cannot be forgiven, and as a result, many people find themselves in God’s own abyss of sorrow.
        “Now, James,” he continued, “I became a psychologist because I wanted to help children who could not realize this, but I do not just mean to tell you that you will go to Hell if you commit suicide.”
        “Then what do you mean to tell me?” James asked, clearly looking for answers.
        “I mean to tell you that you matter, James,” Dr. Gregory replied, “I mean to tell you that you are loved. Your parents love you, God loves you, and I’d be willing to bet that your friends haven’t completely forgotten about you like you think they have.
        “But know this, James,” Dr. Gregory said, sounding like he was about to conclude that which he had to say, “No matter what kind of quagmire you find yourself in, you will always have people who love you by your side.”
        And with that, the expanding balloon of James’s own depression burst. He let out all of his emotions in a cascade of tears rushing down his bright red cheeks. He extended his arms and hugged Dr. Gregory, and the doctor accepted this hug with open arms.
        “Thank you,” James said through his sobbing.
        “It is my absolute pleasure,” the doctor said, “Now, wipe off your tears, and go enjoy what your life has to offer.”
        James used an entire box of tissues to rid his face of tears. He gave Dr. Gregory one more hug and opened the front door to go outside.
        Before starting to walk home, James observed his surroundings. He looked to his left and saw young children frolicking in the playground. He looked to his right and saw a young couple walking their puppy down the sidewalk. He then looked in front of him and saw a teenage boy help an elderly woman walk across the street. Finally, he turned around and looked into the window and saw Dr. Gregory smiling at him.
        And James smiled right back.