Tessa’s feet were dangling in the chlorine filled water, holding a stopwatch. Her best friend was currently trying to beat her time but, this being her third try she was getting slower. Nicole’s long arm slammed against the edge of the pool and shot up in the air with a big breath.

“How did I do?” She exclaims, breathing heavily.

“Not that bad.” Tessa lied smoothly in an attempt to keep her friend calm. She was only a few seconds over more then her last time but to Nicole that might as well be years. She grabs the stopwatch out of Tessa’s hands and scoffs, “Of course.” She says defeated and takes off her goggles.

“ I have to win tomorrow. My mom will kill me if I don’t.” Besides being the best swimmer on her team, her mom happens to be the coach. Her mom is hard enough on the team. Imagine being her daughter.

“Don’t worry Nicole you always win. Plus I’m your good luck charm anyways.” Tessa says cheekily knowing she wasn’t. Even though she has only been to some of her meets Nicole still wins majority of them. Nicole laughed and sat up on the ledge next to her friend.
“I don’t need luck. I need to win.” She told Tessa sadly.  She gets up defeated and asks Tessa if she wants to go home, remembering she had to go out with the team later. Tessa agreed and they got their things. They exited the gym and it was dark outside. Realizing how long they were in there for Tessa felt hungry.
“You want to get some food, I’m starving.” Tessa says dramatically, not wanting to go home. Nicole declined saying she shouldn’t eat any bad food before tomorrow not mentioning her team. Disappointed Tessa unlocks her car and stays quiet until they reach Nicole’s house.
“Thanks for helping me today. We should get food tomorrow night. I can eat all I want after tomorrow.” Nicole laughs and gets out of the car.
“Sure! I’ll see you tomorrow, good luck!” Tessa shouts back.
“I don’t need luck remember?” But she couldn’t help but feel like she did when Tessa drove away.

Tessa pulled up to her big empty house. Her mom was coming home tomorrow and she was so excited. She hasn’t seen her in three weeks and she wanted to hear all of her crazy stories. Her dad left her when she was little and she doesn’t know the first thing about him and she really doesn’t want to know. She used to but after thinking about it she decided she didn’t want to know about someone who didn’t love her.
I hope Nicole’s meet doesn’t take that long. She thought walking into her house. Even though she hated seeing people from school on the weekend she had to be there for her best friend. She went to the bathroom and she looked at herself in the mirror. She was pale and skinny. Short and had long brown hair to make up for it. Her eyes were a light brown and when she wasn’t putting on her happy face, they looked dull. She was nothing like her best friend. Nicole was tall and had bright blonde hair. The two were opposites and standing next to each other Tessa almost looked like her shadow. Darker, duller and was clinging on to her light. The only light she had. She sighed disappointed and walked out of the bathroom into her room tired.  Her pills always made her sleepy. She thought about her mom. She thought about Nicole and even though she didn’t want to she thought about her dad. She fell asleep in her quiet house. The house that looked nice and peaceful but really it was just lonely.

Tessa got up late and now she had to rush over to the school. She quickly brushed her teeth then made sure hair was okay and ran out the door. It wasn’t that long of a drive and she felt like she forgot something but shrugged it off. She hoped Nicole would do okay but another part of her doesn’t want her to. If she does well and get scholarships from all the schools then she wouldn’t be with her. She wouldn’t never really see Tessa and she would probably forget her. She cleared her selfish thoughts out of her head and parked in the school parking lot ready to cheer on her friend.

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Tessa rushed in and sat in the back of the little sitting area in the pool. She saw Nicole getting ready with a small smile on her face and Tessa was taken aback by her confidence. If she were about to do something that could change her career Tessa definitely wouldn’t look that happy. It was crowded in there and Tessa started to feel hot. It was loud and it smelled like chemicals. She hoped it wouldn’t take that long for Nicole to race. About forty-five minutes later she saw Nicole standing on the board getting ready to swim. Tessa was probably more nervous then her. The beep went off and the swimmers swiftly dived into the pool with grace that is only accomplished through years of practice. It was close but Nicole was leading the swimmers to the finish line with nothing but swiftness and speed. Her lead grew and grew and she seemed to only be getting faster. Her long arm slammed against the ledge with a new record and the winner title. She did it. Nicole won and even though Tessa knew what that meant for her, she was glad.

After the race Nicole was busy talking with her teammates and Tessa had to squeeze through the crowd to talk to her. When Nicole spots her she smiles and hugs her.

“You are definitely my good luck charm.” She laughs releasing and Tessa laughs. She was going to miss her but Nicole’s giddy attitude made her happy and soon she was too. 
“You did it!” Tessa yells and laughs. Nicole soon joins and then they couldn’t stop. It was like a cloud of happiness. The crowd didn’t bother her anymore and the stuffiness was nice. Everyone around her was happy. In this moment everyone was fine. This was the last memory Nicole has of Tessa. Her last memory is the both of them in a crowd with big smiles on their faces not noticing others. But soon other people went up to Nicole and she lost her best friend that day. Tessa soon got kicked out of her cloud and felt claustrophobic. She wanted to wave good-bye but went home to her mom instead. She finally wasn’t coming home to an empty house. She had someone to come home to. The drive suddenly felt long. The stops chose to go red and walkers decided to take their time crossing the street. She pulled up to her house feeling excited again.

“Mom?” She yelled walking into her house. “Sorry if you were trying to call me I left my phone at home. I was running late to Nicole’s swim meet and forgot to take it with me.” She says loudly waiting for her mother to reply. She looked around for her bags but she didn’t see any.

“Mom?” She asked again but still no answer. She walked upstairs and she wasn’t there either. She got her phone from her room and saw that her mom called her and texted her. Tessa calls her mom but she doesn’t pick up. She then reads the text she sent and her worry was replaced by anger. Her mom told her they extended her trip and she will have to stay in New York for another week. Tessa felt alone in that big house. Nicole was leaving her and her mom was too. Just like her dad. She hated this big house. She hated her mom. She hated Nicole. She hated her dad. How dare they leave her behind? They leave and forget the shadow. No one loves a shadow. She couldn’t stay in that house anymore. She couldn’t take one more night in that house. That cloud of happiness turned dark and lonely. She had no one. She was no one. No one loves a shadow.

She was shaking. Her whole was body shaking with emotion. She was angry and sad. Why did this hurt her so much? Why was she so alone. Why didn’t they know this house was empty? She wanted this house to be gone. She wanted to be gone. She suddenly felt panicked. How did she live in this dreaded house for so long? She ran into her garage and found a big bottle of gasoline. She poured it everywhere. All over the beautiful couches no one sat on. All over the books no one read  but her. In the kitchen with food she barely ate. She poured the gasoline on a place she once called home. She poured it everywhere and soon she was drenched too. She was wet with tears and gasoline. She sobbed and sat down in her empty house and gave up. She gave up on life, on her mom, on Nicole and on herself. She was done. As tears fell down her cheeks and with shaking hands she lit a match and stared at the little flame. She saw how tiny it was. It was beautiful and bright no matter it size. Its soft light lit up her dark, empty house. Tessa wanted this little light to be seen by the neighbors, by people miles away, by her mom, by her dad, by Nicole. She wanted them to know how bright this flame was. She wanted them to see her. And so, Tessa drop the matched and suddenly she wasn’t a shadow anymore.

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Tessa Handson died at the age of seventeen on November 4, 2013. She was diagnosed with bipolar disease at the age of fourteen. She was given medication that was supposed to be taken daily but there were no signs of medication in her system at the time of the fire. We conclude that this was a successful attempt of suicide and she will forever be missed. The remains of the fallen house are still there and in honor of her memory the town will not rebuild over it. It is a reminder to cherish others and to never forget. Her story will not be forgotten and neither will the rest.