The day I was brought to this dreadful place was long forgotten through time. I guess after so many drugs I was tested on, it must’ve ruined my memory. I don’t know whether I’m lucky or not to be still alive after countless tests but I do know, I won’t be able to taste freedom for a long time…

I heard the lock of my jail cell rattle. It’s my turn again…I wonder what I’ll be tested on this time…As the gate to my jail cell slid open, clanking in the process, two guards rushed in. One guard shoved me face-first against the wall as I felt the other one handcuff me from behind. Afterwards, they forced me outside my cell and into the hallway. They dragged me through the halls where I saw other children locked up in cells. Some were younger and some were older, but they all had the same miserable expression as I did. We all wanted to get out and escape this dreadful place. We all wanted freedom.

“Get inside,” the guard on my left harshly commanded as he yanked the chains of my handcuffs, jerking me inside the lab room against my will. The whole lab room was white that it sickening to look at. The scientist of this room stood in front of me with a clipboard in hand as he examined me with no interest. Ignorant b******…

“Chain him up,” the scientist said with a monotone voice, looking the other way. The guards lifted me up and tossed me onto my back on a white table. One guard held me down as the other one locked the restraints connected to the table on my wrists, waist, and ankles. After the guards had me locked up, they left me alone with the scientist. The scientist peered over me with a needle in hand. It had some strange glowing green liquid in it. With no warning, he pierced my left shoulder with the needle as I screamed away in pain and injected the liquid into me. He removed the needle and placed a bandage over the wound. Without saying anything, the guards came back inside. They removed the restraints and pulled me off the table and off to the hallway again. But instead of bringing me back to my cell, they brought me out to the small courtyard that had a tall, metal barbed fence. They pushed me out of the building and closed the door shut behind me. I weakly stood up from the ground as I staggered to get my balance. I was back in the courtyard again…This small spaced courtyard where you’re left alone for a certain amount of time…They just let us out here so we don’t feel claustrophobic…Yeah, I don’t feel closed up while being surrounded by three concrete walls and a metal barb wire.

As I looked out to the tall grasses behind the metal wires, I think I was starting to hallucinate from the drug effects…Behind the wall in the tall grasses, I saw a girl with shoulder-length, lemon yellow hair underneath a straw, wheat colored bonnet with a white ribbon that seemed to flutter elegantly in the wind. She wore a plain white spaghetti-strap dress that was somehow stunningly beautiful. I don’t know but I don’t see white as sickening as I use to. This girl had to been an angel because she was glowing right in front of my eyes. She can’t be real…

I ran to the barbed fence, trying to get a closer look at her so I can prove I was hallucinating but she was still there in sight. I called out to her, but I guess she couldn’t hear me at all since she was so far away…Even though, I keep calling out to her but it was all wasteful efforts, since she ran off in the opposite direction, disappearing from my sight. I was disappointed…Ultimately disappointed.

I sat by the fence like a watch dog, hoping the girl would come back but as soon as my courtyard time was up, the guards came back and pulled me back into the dreadful place and back into my hateful cell. As I spent my time in there, I couldn’t help but have thoughts of that girl. I wanted to meet her but she was too far away from me. Just like the gap of our lives but I had to find a way to close that gap…Something to connect us.

I shifted across the dirty floor and onto my right side. I then saw in the corner the pile of paper the guards gave us along with a pencil. These supplies were given out for us to record what we thought so the scientists can figure out our mental state. I didn’t want to help the cause, so I barely touched them since I had no use for it.

Suddenly, an idea struck me as I scrambled to my feet. I crawled over and grabbed a sheet of paper and pencil. I guess now I had a reason to use them. I started to write away a message. A message to the girl I saw today.

The next time I was sent out to the courtyard, I made sure I had the letter in my pocket. The guards were too stupid and too ignorant to look into my ragged clothes so I was able to get away with it. As soon as the guards disappeared, I took the letter and folded it into a paper airplane. I looked out to the field behind the wall. I was so happy to see the girl again out there. I hurried to wall again and launched my airplane into the air, hoping it would reach the girl.

I watched as it sailed through the air. The girl took notice of my paper plane and with luck on my side she caught it into her hands. I saw her unravel my letter. That was our connection. From then on, we sent plane letters to each other everyday. I kept all her letters with me. They were my most precious treasures and filled me up with joy and warmth that I haven’t felt since I’ve been in this dreadful place. They were my hope.

Then one day, she sent me a letter, saying she was going somewhere far away and that I won’t be able to see her again. I didn’t understand. I wanted to ask her why but she ran off before I could say.

I became devastated. Without her, what was the point of living now? If she’s gone, then my hope and my will for living will be gone too…She had to be lying to me. Yeah, this was a joke or maybe I’m reading it wrong because of the effects of the drugs.

But true to her letter, she never came back after that. Day after day, there was no sight of her, no matter how much I keep lying to myself that she’ll come back. Life in this dreadful place was becoming how it used to be before I met her. But even if she’s gone, I still have her letters. With these, I can still go on hoping.

I heard the gate of my jail cell slid open. I saw two guards and a scientist come in. The two guards grabbed me and held me against the wall as the scientist grabbed all of her letters. He read them all and leered at me. I saw him dig his hand into his pocket and pull out a lighter. With no hesitation, he set them on fire. They were burning. Burning as fast before I could even react. Then he just drops them to the ground and rubbed them into ashes with his shoe. Rubbing them…Rubbing them…Rubbing them until they became just a stain on the floor.

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!” I screamed.

I just lost it. Once out of my lifetime here, I started to fight back. I bit one of the guard’s arms, making him release me as I took this chance to kick the other one in the shin. After the second guard let go of me to tend to his wound, I charged at the scientist and threw my right fist at his face, sending him flying back to the bars of my jail cell. I grabbed his collar and prepared to punch him again but I was grabbed by the guards and pinned to the ground.

As they guards handcuffed me, I stared at the scientist.

“How could you!? How could you destroy my only hope!? My only memory of her!?” I cried as I struggled against the two guards.

“Send him into the lab room for his last drug,” the scientist muttered, without looking at me. The guards then dragged me more forcefully than before to the lab room. There I went through the same procedure and injected with a new drug, but instead of being brought out to the courtyard, I was sent back to my cell.

I then started to suffer through the effects of the drug but this was more drastic than the usual ones. I started coughing horribly hard. It hurts. Next, my body was turning weak and burning with such ferocity that I can’t control it at all. My mind was spinning around so much I might throw-up. What was happening to me?

*cough* *cough* *cough*

“Hahahaha!!! Hahahaha!!! Hahahaha!!!”

I was laughing like a crazy man now. This place was crazy…I’m crazy…because I’m a part of this place. Hehehehe…The drug is going to kill me…Hehehehe…If only I could see you one more time…Hehehehe…Maybe you can save me…Hehehe…Save me…Hehe…he…he…?

I stopped my hysterical laughter as I wiped the blood I coughed up from the corner of my mouth. I stared with what little life I had left in me on what was in front of me. It was a decent piece of crumpled, dirty, slight torn paper. It must have been left here carelessly by the guards.

*cough* *cough* *cough*

“S***…” I cursed as I covered my mouth. I looked at my hand…It was covered in blood. More blood was dripping out of my mouth and onto the floor…Damn, I couldn’t let it end like this…She’s waiting for me out there somewhere…I have to…reach her. I have to…

I grabbed the paper and searched desperately around for something to write with, but I couldn’t find anything. Those stupid guards took everything except this piece of paper…Damn them! Erg…

*cough* *cough* *cough*

This isn’t good…More blood is coming out…Blood…That’s it! I could use my blood to write a message to her! With no time to waste, I quickly dipped my fingers in my dying blood and spread out the paper and started writing as quickly as I could and whatever sane I had left in me.

*cough* *cough* *cough*

“Crap…” I cursed as I folded the paper into an airplane, with blood dripping all over it. I forcefully dragged myself to the other side of the room where the barred window was. I panted horribly as I tried to position myself well enough to get a good shot. This airplane was my last hope. It had to reach. It just had to!

I summoned whatever energy I had left to send the airplane flying through the bars. After such success, I collapsed to the floor. This was it…I was going to die…I’ve lost too much blood…I am so crazy…I am so stupid…I am so stupidly crazy…I should have realized from the beginning this idea was futile. I’ll never reach her…I was going to die right here, right now while she’s still out there living…It was my fate…My love for her was never enough…Besides…

“I don’t…even know…your name…” I muttered with my dying breath…

---

I always met this boy in ragged clothing at daddy’s workplace. Actually, we never actually formally met in person yet we’ve seen each other…Sounds confusing right? Well, how do I explain this…It’s just…we were separated by a tall, metal barbed fence that seems to stretch forever and we only communicated by paper airplanes with written messages on them. Daddy doesn’t know I come here. If he did, he’d probably get really mad at me since I’m not allowed to leave the hospital…I never made a habit of it before, but ever since I saw that boy, I’ve been secretly escaping my hospital room daily and exchanging letters with him even if it meant worsening my condition, but that’s alright. The boy’s letters were like some sort of medicine or cure for me to keep going. They were my everlasting hope and I cherish that.

One day while I read one of his letters in the hospital bed, daddy caught me. He swiped the letter and started reading it. I tried to get the letter back but he showed me the angriest face I’ve ever seen. I was scared so I drew back.

“Stay away from whoever wrote this letter, do you understand me?” he said with rage clearly present in his voice. I was confused with fear. I didn’t understand why he was so angry.

“Is there more of these letters?” he questioned me as he started searching my room.

“No, there is—,” I tried to lie but he found the drawer filled with his letters. He grabs the whole drawer and shows it to me as evidence.

“Daddy, please!” I begged but he just gave me a cold look.

“I’m getting rid of these,” he said sternly as he walked out with them. I couldn’t help but cry. If he took away his letters, then he took away my hope. I couldn’t help but feel hopeless.

Lately, my condition has started to get worst day by day with the number of tubes inserted in my body. I can barely hear and walk nowadays also. I knew that I might not live any longer, but I couldn’t die without saying goodbye to him.

With whatever leftover ability to move my legs, I escaped the hospital for the last time ever with a plane letter in my hand. I saw him again behind the fence. I sent him the letter and waited for him to read it. He looked at me with a disappointed and confused look.

Don’t look at me like that…I don’t want you to see me cry…I don’t want you to know what I’m dealing with right now…I want you to live your life happy with that smile I always liked.

Just looking at your face, I couldn’t hold in the tears any longer, so I turned around and started running back but I could still hear you yell out to me.

“Even if you’re going away, I’ll wait forever till we meet again!”

That’s it, I couldn’t hold it anymore. I started crying. Tear by tear fell on my way back to the hospital. I was the worst. He’ll never know ever that we’ll never ever meet again.

The day after I said goodbye, my condition soon got much worse. I started feeling pain in my lungs. It started getting hard to breathe. I hear the nurse rush out, calling for a doctor. What’s happening to me? I can hear screaming. Daddy is that you? I can see your face over mine. Why do you look so sad and why can’t I hear you speak? I see your mouth moving but no sound is coming out. Huh? Daddy, where’d you go? What’s this over my mouth? I’m…getting sleepy…What’s…happening to me…?

---

“When need a doctor, stat! Hurry!” I heard from the nurse that just came out of my daughter’s room. It couldn’t be…I rushed into her room, fearing the worst. I can hear my daughter screaming in agony.

“Dear, are you okay!? Are you alright!?” I scream as my daughter looks at me with hazy eyes. She just stares at me and says nothing. Why isn’t she responding!?

“Sir, you have to leave this room!” a nurse told me as a group of nurses started leading me outside the room.

“No! I have to be with my daughter! She needs me right now!” I yelled, trying to force myself inside.

“I’m sorry, sir! She’s in critical condition right now! What she needs now is a miracle!” the nurse yelled in my face as she shut the door in front of me.

How could this have happen? She was suppose to live on a littler longer by a few months…I know…It’s that boy’s fault…The one who my daughter keeps seeing. It’s his fault that this happened to her! Mark my words, I will find you, boy! Whoever you are, I will make you suffer for this! I know you live in the facility. Your fate is mine.

When I came to work after that day, I searched through the jail cells of each child, searching for one who had a pile of plane letters. Finally, I found him lying around on the floor, covered with letters while smiling happily.

I felt enraged. How could he sleep so peacefully while my daughter is in pain? He deserves to die!

I called out two guards and told them to restrain the boy. As they did as they were told, I grabbed the letters. I read one and I could tell it was my daughter’s handwriting. I grinded my teeth and without thought, I took out my lighter and lit the letters on fire. They burnt so brightly. I watched as he looked at horror. I dropped the letters down and stomped on them, rubbing them into ashes.

Suddenly, I felt a fist smash into my face as I fell back onto the bars. I saw the boy on top of me with my collar in his grip. He face was filled with anger as he prepared to punch me again but then the guards restrained him better this time. I looked at this boy’s face.

“How could you!? How could you destroy my only hope!? My only memory of her!” he yelled at me with tears coming out of his eyes. What was it in this boy’s cry that made me felt guilty? No, this is no time to feel guilty…

“Send him into the lab room for his last drug,” I muttered, without looking him in the eye anymore. With that, the guards left with him. I got up and dusted myself off. I need to forget him now. He’s going to die after his last check-up anyway, since the last one is all poison.

As I headed to the head office, I quit my job. I only needed the job to pay for the rest of my daughter’s hospital bills. I’m going to devote all my time to her now. She’ll get better. She will. The boy is gone now. He will not interfere anymore.

---

How long has it been since I’ve last seen you? I hope you’re still smiling there and thinking of me. I wish I could thank you for that but sadly, I can’t move anymore. The doctors say my condition is getting worse and worse. You know, the day when we said goodbye? I regret it. I really wish I could have told you the truth but I guess it’s too late for that…I’m sorry, I lied to you…If you can hear me, I really wish I could see you again. I miss you. I love you…

---

It’s been over a month and my daughter’s condition hasn’t gotten any better. It has actually gotten worse. But still, I stayed by her side.

Today, I brought in the flower my daughter loves so much and placed it on her bedside.

“How are you doing…?” I questioned softly, seeing she as awake, but her eyes were barely opened.

“Dad…dy…I’m…going…to…die…am…I…?” she whispered through her oxygen mask. I gave her a sad smile. She was going to die. The doctor told me before that she only has a few hours to live now and time was almost up for her.

“Shh…It’s okay now…Don’t say anything anymore. Just…go to sleep now, dear,” I told her as I held her hand and gave her my most forced smile in history. I had to smile no matter how much I wanted to cry. Even if it was a sad smile, I had to do something for her so she can die in peace and not feel remorse when the last thing she remembers of me is bawling my eyes out.

“O…kay…” she barely whispered as she slowly shut her eyes closed. I heard the beeping go into a slow rhythm, signaling it was her time to go soon…I looked at the boy’s bloody message in my hand. I found this in the field outside the facility one day. It had to be him. I remember his face. His sad face…He made me regret so much…but I don’t hold anything against him anymore.

“If you can hear me, I’m sorry for what I did…but please, watch over her for me,” I said, hoping even the slightest, that the boy heard my message. Just before the long continuously beep came, I placed the boy’s paper airplane into my daughter’s hand. Something for her to take… Something to lead her to you…

---

I opened my eyes. Where was I? This is…the field…? Why am I standing in the field?

Suddenly, I felt a gust of wind. As I looked up, I saw a paper airplane. I know that airplane. It was yours! It had to be yours!

I ran after it, like I had all the energy in the world. No illness could hold me back. I had to reach it. I had to reach you.

---

I’m lost…How long have I’ve been wandering in the darkness? I know I asked for freedom, but this wasn’t the freedom I wanted…What’s so good about freedom when you have no one to share it with?

As I tried to figure out how much time had past, I felt a gust of wind. As I closed my eyes to sheath them from it, I felt strange…Like I could float in the air or something. When I opened them back, I was surrounded by tall acres of grass. I knew this place…I was in the field that was behind the barbed wall!

I looked around and somewhere far off in the middle of all these tall weeds was a flower. It bloomed beautifully. I ran off towards that flower. It reminded me so much of you. Even if it wasn’t you, I had to reach it. I had to reach you.

---

As I had my daughter buried, I planted the flower she loved so much above her grave and placed the boy’s airplane next to it. With that, they can be together. It what my daughter wanted. It’s what he wanted. It’s what they wanted…It’s the least I could do for them…

---

I grabbed the airplane. That was when I saw you, right next to me.

---

I picked up the flower. That was when I saw you, right next to me.

---

We smiled at each other. We finally meet again.