Three men sat in the cockpit of the spaceship Nemesis as it hurtled through space.  The Nemesis was a sleek silicon snake of a ship, with a lightbulb-shaped cockpit that resided between two cylindrical engines.  It had been stolen from the Galactic Police in the year 4005 by space pirates for the purpose of raiding ships and looting their valuables.  The ship was heavily armed, and it was perfect for huge, unavoidable gunfights with other ships. 

A panel of buttons and screens emitted the only light in the cockpit.  One by one, the lights switched off, as did the engines, abnormally.  A loud jolt shook the spacecraft as something lodged into the engine.

            Stalin, the captain of the ship, and Moneybags, the first mate, looked out the cockpit window.  Desperately, the two crewmates, with no control over the ship, attempted to manually control their quickly plummeting ship.  Unhelpfully, Dim, whose role on the ship was unclear, sat on the side and screamed loudly.  Their ship smashed down into the soft dust of the planet, creating a massive, steaming crater. 

            “Ahh!  Save me!”  Dim screamed loudly, as the smell of jet fuel leaked into the cabin of the ship.  

“Calm down, Dim.  Remember my motto: Control with calmness.”  Swiftly, Stalin opened the heavily dented door, to make a quick escape, in the case that the rocket fuel ignited.    

            “There!  Now I wonder what happened.”  Stalin mulled through the events of the past minute in his head while the first mate, Moneybags, walked over to the cockpit and looked out the windows, wondering what could have caused the spaceship to stop.

            “We’ve crashed on a planet!”  he exclaimed.  Moneybags excitedly contemplated the natural resources of the planet. 

Stalin rushed over, and also looked out the windows.  Amazing!  We survived!  It’s time to start enslaving natives!    Meanwhile, Moneybags walked out of the door, deciding to explore. 

            “How nice to feel fresh air!”  Dim spread his arms.  As if mimicking him, the many green tentacles sticking out of the ground waved in the wind.  Dim stooped down to examine one.  Suddenly, it shot out, wrapping around his body and lifting him into the air. 

            “Help!  I’m being dragged underground!”  Dim struggled wildly, but the tentacle was too strong.

            Moneybags and Stalin ran over just in time to see Dim’s frantic hand slip into the ground.

            “Maybe we should just leave him.”  Moneybags imagined a life without Dim.  No screaming!  No panicking!  In short, peace. 

Stalin objected.  “No!  It’s our duty to save our crew member!” 

            “Alright.  Let’s go into the crack.” 

Stalin and Moneybags jumped into the crack, and were instantly assailed by many giant spiders.  They could see Dim in the back of the cave being wrapped in a white, feathery substance. 

            “What should we do?”  Moneybags loudly whispered.  A particularly large spider turned toward him, and lunged.  It missed, instead catching Stalin.  

            “Ahh!”  Stalin was grabbed by a spider and carried to the back of the cave. 

Moneybags sat in a raging sea of spiders, and his ears were now pierced by a new sound: the sound of the spiders screeching with delight.  He flopped to the ground, in hopes of being passed over by the spiders because of his mainly black clothing.  Luckily, his plan succeeded.  Now is my chance to look for money!  He watched as the pack of spiders scampered down a long corridor, screeching the whole way.  Moneybags crawled out of the cave and set about repairing the ship to search for riches.  Unfortunately, he soon realized that he needed the assistance of a fellow human to properly look for money.

            Stalin and Dim were carried in their cocoons to a large chamber, which had a towering mountain in the middle.  The spiders carried them up to the very summit, in which there was a pit.  Dim craned his neck to see what the pit contained, and swiftly averted his eyes, for he saw what the pit contained.  The bones of previous victims surrounded it, and its eight bulging, slimy, disgusting eyes peered toward its prey.  Now unveiled to the delicate humans was Gorgol, the Spider Queen, oh most monstrous and vicious of all arachnids!  The mere sight of its straining maw and gleaming fangs sucked all hope from the astronauts.  For they had seen Death itself, residing in its lair. 

            First to go was Stalin, who was thrown unceremoniously into the sweat and saliva that soaked throughout the mountain.  The vicious jaws of the daughter of Death snapped as fast as a Venus fly trap on a fly, and began to work off the spider silk that surrounded its food. 

            Finally, after many minutes, the fangs had torn off all the silk and reached Stalin’s body.  Dim watched in horror as Stalin grimaced. 

            Suddenly, as if the fly had stung, Gorgol released her jaws.  What happened?  It isn’t smart for the spider to release Stalin, right?  Dim was perplexed.  Soon, however, he saw the cause of the spider queen’s hesitance.  A loud roaring sound echoed throughout the chamber, and the ceiling began to crumble.  The spiders dropped Dim and scuttled away into various holes in the ground.  Rocks crashed all around him as he climbed up the mountain and dust filled the air.  Dim gasped for air as he tumbled back down the mountain.  Stalin, who was still trapped in the vicious maw of the spider, gave a shout of delight when he saw the glistening exterior of his now-repaired spaceship. 

His savior, Moneybags, manning a spaceship, sliced into the cavern and dropped a rope while shooting the massive spider.  Bullets struck the spider, blinding it, as Stalin jumped and grasped the rope. 

Meanwhile, Dim tumbled into a pile of bones.  Turning around, he saw the rotting flesh and the many bugs crawling on the white bones.  He screamed, and ran, spying the spacecraft in the distance. 

            “Noo!  Don’t leave me behind!”  Dim jumped with all his might, barely grabbing onto Stalin’s leg. 

            “Ahh!  What’s wrong with you?” 

            The shining spaceship lowered, firing one final blast at the spiders, before rising away into the atmosphere. 

In the spaceship, Stalin breathed a sigh of relief.

            “What a close encounter with death, eh?”  Hearing Stalin’s voice, Dim turned from a specimen of spider hair. 

            “Indeed!” he said. 

            Moneybags acted as if he did not hear, instead tapping many buttons on the control panel.  Stalin had dissuaded him from staying on the “dangerous planet.” 

            “I’m activating our warp drive so we can get away faster.  We should be lightyears away in about five minutes.  Meanwhile, let us sit back and enjoy the view.” 

Moneybags collapsed into his chair and looked out the windows. 

Suddenly, Dim screamed in terror, his eyes wide with fear at what was clearly a terrible sight.  Hairy limbs stuck out of the sides of the cockpits.  Stalin and Moneybags realized when it was only too late: the spiders had stowed away in the engines!