I have the road all to myself.
making it so I have no limitations.
giving me the feeling of freedom.
causing me to take no precautions.
I drive on whatever side I please.
no worries, no problems. Letting my
heart take me wherever it desires.

After a half hour of pedaling, over hills
then back down again I come to a meadow.
flat on my back I lay, eyes wide open as I stare
at the cotton puff clouds. The grass feels warm under my skin. The sun’s heat making contact with my face. The smells of the wild daisies floating through the air. It’s the perfect place to escape. To get away from everything in this crazy world.

My eyes becoming heavy with much needed sleep. My heart rate slowing down to a silent thud against my chest. My mid drifting away, but not too far as it is careful to make sure I know it’s still there. As I surrender myself to the meadow I hear his voice. I see him through my closed eye lids. I feel his hand rub against my face. It’s him. It’s grandpa.

Once again I find myself looking from the outside. I know grandpa has been dead for eight years now. Every now and then I like to pretend that he is still here with me. This time would be one of those moments. I open my eyes just in time to see grandpa standing in the sunlight, white sparkly stuff floating around him.

“Grand pa!” I cry out as I run for him. His hands outstretched waiting for me to jump in them. “Kayla, my, my, how have you grown. You’re so tall. Yet you haven’t changed a bit.
Where has time gone?” he said as he took me by the shoulders, and then kissed me on top of the head. “It’s been a long time grandpa; you’ve been dead for eight years now.” Tears soaking my sleeve as I brushed them away.

“I know honey… I know it’s been a long time. I’ve missed you as much as you have missed me. Now I have a second chance to be with you. The only thing is that you won’t see me, but I will be there. I promise you that. I have screwed up once, I won’t do it again. I won’t lose my family. “Grandpa, call me by my nickname? For old time sake.” I whispered in his ear as I became fascinated with the sunset. “What nickname?” he said in a cunning voice. Grin spreading across his wrinkly face.

“Grandpa!! C’mon. You know what I mean.” I said as I began to lightly tug on the cloth he had around him. “Oh… you mean that nick name. What was it again? Hot Rod wasn’t it? No wait that was Kadin’s.” He seemed puzzled for awhile. I looked away ashamed that he had forgotten about his first grandchild. “Hey Scooter… give me another hug will yah?” I turned around and squeezed him as hard as I could.

“Do you really think that I would forget
your nickname?” he said as he walked over
to an old withered up willow tree. Like an
obedient puppy I followed him. “No I just
wanted to hear you say it.” smiling as I spoke
it. He pulled me close and told me how sorry he was for all the time that he had wasted. All the memories he hadn’t made. He told me that if he could do it all over again. He would in a heartbeat.

“Kayla wake up...hey Scooter wake up.”
As he picked me up and started walking somewhere. My eyes slowly creped open.
First focusing on him then my background.
Where was I? Where was my bike? What happened t o the sunlight? The only thing I felt was safe in is big strong arms. “Grandpa where are we going?” I managed to mumble out the words. “I’m taking you home, don’t worry just go back to sleep.” he spoke into the night.
“Grandpa… don’t leave me.” again mumbling, snuggling closer to his chest. “ Don’t worry Kayla… I’ll be right there when you wake up.
I won’t leave you again Scooter.”

I don’t know how long it took us to get
back to the house. Or how we even got
there. My bike was way too small for a grown
man to fit on it. Honestly I think we flew to my
house. It doesn’t even matter. Once grandpa placed me in my bed I was fully wide awake. I rolled over just in time to see him half way out
of the door.”Grandpa where you going? I
thought you weren’t going to leave me again?”
I spoke as I sat straight up in bed.

“Honey…Kayla…Scooter…I have to go, I have no other choice. The big man upstairs says it’s against the rules.” He knelt down along side my bed. “But…you promised me remember?1” I was no practically close to tears. “Listen Scooter I want to stay too, but there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t want leave you either. Don’t go making this harder than it already is. It’s not far to either of us.” That was the first time I ever saw my grandpa cry. I could tell that he really didn’t want to leave either.

After the long talk we had, I laid back down under the covers. Whishing that grandpa could stay with me. “Kayla…Before I leave I just want you to know that I have and will always love you. I will always be proud of you. You will always be my Scooter. Just remember that. Just promise that you will remember me the way I was before the cancer, the good times. One more thing, don’t let anyone get in your way of your dreams. Life is full of road blocks; you just have to be strong enough to get over them.” Was one of the last things he said to me that night. “It’s time for me to go.
“Bye Scooter, love you
“Bye Grandpa, love you too.