Three times now, I almost died, and no one had noticed. It's as if I don’t exist, I'm not real to the people around me. It’s like they don't care about my presence. That can't possibly be true though . I interact with my family, I have a home, and they all have completely real emotions. I have a mind, I  must exist because I have thoughts. Even in skepticism, René Descartes was well ...skeptical of everything except for his existence. The belief was that he had thoughts and a mind, so therefore he must exist. 

But that's what I used to think. Everything nowadays seems so fabricated and scripted. I can't go to my own family to talk without feeling I was on a tv sitcom show. I can’t go to my own room without feeling like I'm on a movie set. Now I’ve seen ‘’the Truman Show’’ But this felt nothing like it.  I don’t even feel real. 

One day I was walking home from school, and I got hit by a car. I'm always very careful walking down the street. I look both ways, I signal to the cars, I stop when I need to etc.  A woman with a burgundy  suit on and what looked like a lanyard around her neck had just struck me with her black car. The expression on her face was determined and a bit angry. I was just walking, minding my own business. I always keep to myself, why would she do that? I wasn't even in the middle of the street. I was on the curb. It was as if she had tried to. People simply walked by the incident. They had a grin on their face, like they never saw a thing. I was on the floor completely fine. I just stared at the sky. I couldn't look at her, it was as if my body was paralzed. But I could move my fingers and legs.  She glared at me then murmured something under her breath then just  drove away. I had zero clue what was going on ,but I could tell she did something wrong. 

Now this exact incident has occurred three times, different areas, same time, different perpetrators. First was on my way home from school and a man with a black suit and the same lanyard around his neck had hit me.The second time was walking my dogs , thankful they were not injured, all though if they were like me they probably were immune from injuries. And finally, the third time was on my way to the library. Which is the only place I felt wasn't so scripted. It was quiet, but it seemed different. The books all said the same things, talked about the same topic.  All of these activities are very common and a part of my routine. Strangers were all present for these events. 

I told my parents about it. They told me something really strange. 

 “ Whatever life endeavor you choose to take, we will always be there for you. Now give your papa a hug! “

“ 

“ Yeah honey, family is forever. People may come and go, but we will always be by your side.’’ 

I found myself saying “ Awww thank you guys. Family is forever” And motioned to hug both my parents. I forced myself a few small tears and felt a smile coming out of my cheeks. I couldn't fight it. After that happened, I forced myself to walk up the stairs to my room. I couldn't move. I was in shock. How did family have to do with anything? I didn't think to say those words, my brain didn't tell my body to say that. I sat in silence on my bed. 

Right then and there, I wanted to punch my walls to see how thin they were. If my knuckles would bleed at my weak attempt. I walked over to the blue lighter. I turned it on, and brought it to my pointer finger. As the flame drew closer to my finger, I couldn't feel the heat. I brought it closer until the fire touched my finger,again nothing. I was gaining consciousness, emotions but it was like my body was like a doll. I was a puppet for something greater.