I looked down at the pills in my hand, the simple over-the-counter things that could end my life in merely seconds. All those years could be put to an abrupt end with a simple flick of my wrist. All of the now ever-present pain would quickly fade away.


My thoughts were interrupted by the honk of a school bus, marking the end of my reverie. That was when I made up my mind. I would go to school, tie up loose ends, and empty my locker so that my mother wouldn’t have to. When I came home I would take those pills before my mom came home from work.


I stepped onto the faded yellow bus feeling sad, something I hadn’t felt in a long time. I hadn’t really felt anything in a long time. I pressed my forehead to the cool glass, and stared at the clueless people going about their busy lives. Would any of them care? Once I was gone, would any of them wish they had helped me? Probably not, the only ones who would feel anything would be the ones who had pushed me to this limit. They deserved to feel at the very least a small portion of what I had been going through. Every hateful remark, action, and thought; had been like breaking a stone wall with a hammer, bit by bit, until there was nothing left but rubble. That’s all I had left the shattered remains of was once a happy young girl.Yes I understood that it was selfish of me to think this way, to wish pain on those who had caused mine. Some would even call my petty desires childish, but I didn’t care. They deserved to feel guilt for what they had caused me to do.

“Katie? Is that you?” I looked up surprised, and wiped the unexpected tears off my face. When was the last time I had cried like this? I looked around to find the source of the unusually friendly voice, and did a double take at the sight of her. I must have the wrong girl, right? She was the most popular girl in school, the one who does nothing, and yet has everything. We used to be best friends, before my world turned against me.

“Yeah...” I managed to say, attempting to keep my voice from wavering.

“You okay? You seem really sad.”


Was she serious? She’d been the one to spread the first rumor, to plant the first dagger in my back. Was this some sick way for her to drop another bomb on me? I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt, there was a time where she had been the kindest person I knew.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it,” I said wiping the last runaway tear off my cheek.

“So how have things been?” She stood up and sat down right next to me. This had to be a joke, a reality show with hidden cameras. No one talked to me, not anymore, and especially not her. Why was she trying to start up a conversation? Some people had tried reaching out to me, but they’d all given up after a line or two.

All the way to school she kept the questions up. What were my hobbies? Did I play any sports? Strangely I even caught myself smiling a few times. Not the fake smiles I’d become so accustomed to plastering on my face, half smirk-like things I actually meant. As the day went on she was all I could think about. After school I ran to the bus and sat with her again the whole way home.

“Hey, Katie? I’m really sorry, for everything,” she said sadly, as if it had been weighing on her for a long time.

“Yeah, I know.”


I walked slowly into my house, and stared at the pills I’d left behind on the table. Resolutely, I picked them up and flung them into the trash can. That day I gave life, and humanity, a second chance. That girl screwed my life up, but she also turned it right again. She saved me from myself, and that was all I needed.