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Why does this happen?!?
We all are different
But why is something better
Why is it we get picked on
Why can't anyone just accept
I close my eyes
I plug my ears
I hide my tears
I cry silently, no one can hear
No one sees
No one listens
Everyone talks
Why does it happen to me
I hung out with the guys
The girls didn't like me
I am be a female
I don't understand what I supposedly did wrong
I'd run and hide
I cried violently
I distanced myself from girls
The guys were my refuge
I grew up rough
I mostly acted like a guy
I know what could happen
I know I'm physically strong
I wear some old shoes
I wear old blue jeans
I put on a guy's T-shirt
I do this cause it's comfortable
I try to smile
I'm nice, I can't stay mad for long
If I do, I feel ill
So I just stay sad
I hide in the library
I fold into myself
I don't want to feel anymore
I can taste the salty sadness and pain flowing down my cheeks
I feel the heavy load on my heart
I still don't understand
I try to be myself
Maybe that's the problem to people
I've thrown my glasses in frustration
I've tried to deal with it alone
I've never known how to make it stop
I wonder if someone has a stop button
Maybe if I just ignore them
Maybe I shouldn't stay here
I want to leave
Is there anywhere that's safe
I've tried talking to adults,
but there is always someone new I have to talk to
I just want it to end
Maybe I should just stay with the guys
I won't talk to the girls anymore
I'll talk to my friends
maybe they could help
but maybe they can't
I don't know
I'm just so tired
I'm too sad
I don't care
I don't have enough energy to care
If talking won't help
I'll just keep writing
Maybe one day I'll get rid of the salty sadness and pain
Maybe I'll get the energy back
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