Fitting In | Teen Ink

Fitting In MAG

By MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I wouldn't ask for a dressing room. My mom always asked for me.
The evening before I had repeatedly risen from my seat and piled on excess noodles suffocated in meat sauce. Then I licked my bowl with the buttered garlic bread, leaving no evidence of the four servings I had inhaled. In the morning I would be forced to lie on my bed and suck in my stomach just to button my jeans. I dreaded school shopping. The sale rack, with its slender size markers, knew my number continued to bloat.

I learned how to eat from my dad: fast and without thinking. In our house, the dinner table involved battle, with the children on defense. One false move and our dinner would be snatched off our plates without warning and gobbled up by our father faster than we could blink. We soon learned to keep a hand up while devouring our chicken strips, and if Mom decided to cook that night we needed to hurry and get seconds before it was gone.

Only one pair of jeans I tried on fit. I lied and told my mother I could button every pair but only needed the jeans that lay guarded in my hands. We walked to the checkout.

I kept my head down as we passed a group of girls. They whispered. I glanced up only long enough to know my place. Their eyes cut at me, hands cupped over their mouths in secrecy.

***

The recess bell rang and I followed two girls in my third grade class out past the monkey bars to the fenced grassy area. We all wore the same clothes that year: khaki pants and polo shirts. Everyone was the same, or that was the idea.

“I like your pants. Where did you get them?” Marcy asked Alicia. I nodded in agreement, thankful they had removed their cupped hands and I could hear the conversation.

“Really? I like yours better,” Alicia replied.

“We should trade. What size are you?” Marcy asked.

“I don't know …” Alicia said, finding the tag in the back of her pants. “Seven.”

“Me too,” Marcy said.

***

I hid in line as I held the jeans, tag folded in so nobody could see the number inscribed on it was 12. I am not a size seven.



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This article has 348 comments.


on Dec. 3 2011 at 10:47 pm
Nora2012 BRONZE, Tenafly, New Jersey
4 articles 13 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One who throws mud has no ground."

i love the double meaning title. the only thing you should be worried about when people whisper is that they are jealous of ur amazing writing :D

 


on Dec. 1 2011 at 8:56 pm
Karles_Ivy PLATINUM, Sunnyside, Washington
23 articles 0 photos 62 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes the bully isn’t the captain of the cheerleaders or the girl who for some reason has it out for only you; sometimes the worst bully of them all is you.- Karles_Ivy

I absolutely loved this, especially because I could see myself in in it, but don't fret, a size 12 is nothing to worry about, it's beautiful even. Plus, it's good to stand out, like your writing.

on Dec. 1 2011 at 8:56 pm
Internal-Love PLATINUM, Queens, New York
33 articles 3 photos 310 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nothing's black or white, its all just a shade of gray---

















TI "Live your Life" ft Rihanna

You say so much in only a matter of words

on Nov. 16 2011 at 3:38 pm
Brokenness_is_Beautiful SILVER, Independece, Louisiana
6 articles 3 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is so ironic to understand fully, it takes sadness to know what is happiness. noise to distinguish silent and a broken heart to find true love.

This is very well written. I wanted to cry. I have the opposite problem-I do fit in a size zero. Most people don't. Some used to think I had an eating disorder. It sucks, I know.

on Nov. 15 2011 at 6:43 pm
RaveFire PLATINUM, Vancouver, Washington
32 articles 1 photo 217 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Sometimes You Have To Give Up Your Life To Save It." ~some book that i don't remember the name of

"Live Life Like There's No Yesterday" ~ random billboard

"If No One Can Hurt You, Then Nobody Loves You" ` ~ Kerli?

i went from a size 16 to a size 7 to a size 13.  its not worth it...

on Nov. 10 2011 at 1:55 pm
Tawanna Daniels, Eutaw, Alabama
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Girl I thought you ab0ut to say that you were a size 18 or sum. A size 12 is nothying. You're beautiful inside and out. Tell yourself that everyday. :)))

on Nov. 9 2011 at 2:59 pm
liveincolor GOLD, Gainesville, Florida
17 articles 3 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
You need to be the change you wish to see in the world. ~Ghandi

Same for me. I used to think that i looked horrible going up a size from 1, but now i realize that curves look good on a girl, and i have to love the body i have, which is a size 5.

on Nov. 9 2011 at 1:59 pm
LifesIllusion BRONZE, Cicero, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 127 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't let your fears slow you down. Instead, chase them down and beat them."

Loved the article by the way!

on Nov. 9 2011 at 1:58 pm
LifesIllusion BRONZE, Cicero, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 127 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't let your fears slow you down. Instead, chase them down and beat them."

I have always felt heavier built than most of my friends also! I am certaily not OVERWEIGHT but I am not  a size 0 either. But I think that's okay too.

on Nov. 9 2011 at 4:56 am
Lady-Milano BRONZE, Richardsbay, Other
1 article 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When ever someone says life is so hard I'm tempted to ask,compared to what?"

well said,great article.

gemar BRONZE said...
on Oct. 9 2011 at 1:59 pm
gemar BRONZE, Glendale, Arizona
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

This article was very well written! It had very good literary elements and great points that i think we all go through at some point or another... This is so true and so sad to know that this world is like this. That was me. And in some ways still is me, so i know how it feels, although Im not OVERWEIGHT, i am still more of a heavier build than most of my friends. 

Very nicely written, i really enjoyed this article!


freegoing said...
on Sep. 27 2011 at 10:44 am
im with you girll.

on Sep. 26 2011 at 3:21 pm
clumsyteardropper SILVER, Roslyn, Pennsylvania
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You can't help others, if you yourself need help" -my sister ;) love it!

that is just so sad, and wrong how you have to be thin to be in!  we should love anyone (including ourself) for who they are beyond the size number of the jeans they wear, or just how they look.  i used to take pills when i was six, seven, and eight... but now i choose to accept who i am wheather i like it or not :)

on Sep. 8 2011 at 3:12 pm
DoloresDarling, Cambridge, Ohio
0 articles 0 photos 137 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sarah Michelle Gellar- [on the importance of reading] I love books. I\'m constantly afraid we\'re moving into this digital era where books are going to go away, and to me books are the basis to everything in life. Reading is how we function.

I feel every girl/woman goes threw this. I use to starve myself to fit into a size 1 or 2. I'm over that now.

I wear a size 3-5..and I don't really care. Most girls who wear a size 0-2..look emaciated, which looks terrible.

I hope one day us girls will stop worrying so much about our pant size..and what not :3


cieramist GOLD said...
on Sep. 4 2011 at 4:22 pm
cieramist GOLD, Orlando, Florida
17 articles 2 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right." ~ Henry Ford

Wow, I can really relate to this.  I have I guess a kind of similar problem but in a different way.  I'm a size three/four but I've always been excessively weight conscious. I'm a vegetarian, I work out almost everyday and I dance, too.  But I never feel small enough.  It's really been tough for me to always feel too big or not pretty enough - I think this really captures what a lot of people go through.  Great job!

LeahRae<3 GOLD said...
on Sep. 4 2011 at 1:29 pm
LeahRae<3 GOLD, Maiden, North Carolina
14 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Them that dont like me can leave me alone." -- Jacky Faber (From Bloody Jack)

The feeling of being left out because of something as petty as size or looks is something a lot of kids can relate to. Very nice way to portray it.

on Aug. 30 2011 at 10:51 am
x.beth_mia.x BRONZE, Droitwich, Other
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
'' Never give up''
'' Always be yourself''

I found that this article really made me think. It makes you realise the pressure that teenage girls go through. I think peer pressure also comes in to it at well. Well done and keep up the good work!

on Aug. 2 2011 at 2:09 pm
ShontelleSymone GOLD, New Castle, Pennsylvania
15 articles 0 photos 51 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Are you chasing your dreams? Or are your dreams chasing you?" - Michelle Phan

I find fitting in highly overrated. I will admit, I tried to fit in a couple times. I changed who I was for small minded people in a idiotic school that I don't even go to. The friends you make in high school won't be there in the future. Nine times out of ten, the friends that will be there for you for the majority of your life, will be the friends you make in college. Trust me when I tell you, being naturally skinny, fat, poor, rich, etc, dosen't matter. Because people are not always gonna like you regardless because people are cruel. Just find the people you click with the most and screw anyone else who wants to hate on you.

on Jul. 22 2011 at 11:38 pm
october34 SILVER, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
6 articles 2 photos 12 comments
I love this story! I'm naturally skinny because of my high metabolism but I'm still scared to share my weight. I mean whether you weigh a lot or little people still judge. It's not fair!

on Jul. 22 2011 at 7:04 pm
Angie.Hudak GOLD, Doylestown, Pennsylvania
10 articles 0 photos 42 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Hope for the best, expect the worst."
"One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain." -Bob Marley

I beyond love this story! I'm with yoitsme, I'm natually skinny. But I wasn't always. I used to be extremely over weight, but as I grew up, I thinned out a lot. I went from like a size 14 to 00.