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I Should've Known
I think the three most painful words to think to oneself are, “I should’ve known”. Three words that are always the basis of regret. Regret is a terrible feeling, always including thoughts of things one could’ve done better. I Should’ve Known. I should’ve known that changing my answer on that multiple choice quiz from A to C was wrong. I should’ve known that saying that to my best friend wasn’t nice. I should’ve known that throwing that party when my parents weren’t home was going to get me grounded.
When it comes to love, saying “I should’ve known” is the worst outcome. I should’ve known he was going to hurt me. I should’ve known not to fall in love so quickly. I should’ve known not to let my guard down so easily. I should’ve known he didn’t love me back. I should’ve known that he was just using me.
Regret is a terrible feeling. It eats us from the inside out, and causes us to lay awake at night reimagining things that we could’ve done to make things turn out differently.
It’s annoying when people say that everything happens for a reason. Like thanks. I get it. But sometimes we have to get past the annoyance and realize that maybe it’s true. Maybe choosing C on the test caused us to realize in the future to go with our gut feeling, and not second guess ourselves. Maybe saying that accidental rude comment to our friend caused us to realize that we really do treasure our best friend and wouldn’t want to ever intentionally hurt them. Maybe throwing that one troublesome party caused us to realize how much our parents do trust us, and how valuable that trust is and how hard we should work for it. Realization causes growth, and we’re only human. Regret causes negative energy that can get in the way of living in the present moment. Mistakes are going to happen, it’s inevitable. But a magic time machine isn’t going to suddenly appear, nor will a ghost from our future come up to us and say, “You should know this. This is going to happen if you don’t.” Living the “I should’ve known” lifestyle is just painful and unnecessary, and we need to learn how to avoid it.
In regards to love, “I should’ve known” will always be prevalent. But love is different. “I should have known he was going to hurt me” isn’t reality. No one knows what the future holds with that. You can’t blame yourself for a failed relationship, because it’s not your fault. I believe the universe brings together two people for a reason, because they vibe together. When their lips touch, it’s indescribable. In that amazing moment you will never think to yourself, “I know he will hurt me.” Even if he has a reputation for being a player, you want to believe it won’t happen to you. This is FINE. In life, you can’t question love. You just have to let it do what it does. When you see him across the room and get butterflies, don’t shut them down. Embrace them. Don’t live in the, “I should’ve known”. Live in the now. Be happy.
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