I rarely ever talk about you, but I’ve always thought about you.
Regret is such a simple word for such a strong feeling. A feeling of empty hollowness, unworthy love, and a bittersweet night which all add up to my hatred for someone who taught me how to live a lie. It started at night and ended at night. That’s all you ever knew was the dark and unbearable day when the sun had set upon the hills. That’s all you’ll ever know. A pure an innocent soul taken for granted, for what purpose? For the purpose of nothing other than to conquer what wasn’t yours. Well you can have it, I don’t want it back and I don’t ever want to call it mine, not if you have tainted it with your pure bliss of obscurity. I regret ever meeting you. I regret that ride in your jeep. I regret the fact that you knew how to look at me with one glance and make the world around me disappear, and seem so small in comparison to what was. I regret that you knew how to speak to me in such charm that I did anything, with no thought as to what the consequences were. I regret that smile you always shown when I came around. I regret that you actually made me happy, the happiest I’ve ever been. I regret that snarky laugh you would pull upon me. I regret that you would always kiss me at the wrong moments, so that my heart would melt into a million pieces because I knew you thought about her when you did the awful sin you did. I regret your hands touching the small of my back in a way that I would quiver with passion. I regret ever thinking you were mine. I regret ever thinking I was yours. I regret the fact that I started to drink again because you wanted me to. I regret that I would listen to your lies and believe them over everybody’s truth all because I thought you were more than what you really were. I regret that you would hug me in a way that I never wanted to leave your arms. I regret that I had to lie to my parents about where I was, knowing the whole time they were right, they always were. I regret your charm ever taking a hold of my heart and capturing it with such a tight grasp. I regret giving you the one thing that was meant for the one true love I will find someday. I regret driving down the road and seeing a jeep and always secretly hoping it’s you just so you can see me, and see how great I’m doing without you. I regret the phone call you made eight months later because I was actually glad to hear your voice. I regret the fact that I still think about you and what might have been. I regret that she doesn’t know. I regret that we said I love you, deep down knowing you didn’t mean it. I regret you…but the biggest regret of all is the fact that I was stupid enough to fall for you, because I knew in my heart that I was too good for you, and I still am. I’m done this time. Were over, You…are over!