As the smoke cleared my mind started to fog. All the riches in the world could not bring me to a mature state of mind. The ring on my finger kept attracting my blood shot eyes and filled my mind with far out ideas that would just put my mind farther away from resolving yet another one of my many problems.
The pain comes and it goes, it strikes you like a thorn in your finger, even after you think you’ve got it out of your system there is still more pain left. I close my eyes, yet the pain does not fade. This pain that I seem to undergo is caused by an emptiness that I feel inside. Each and every time this feeling floods through my veins the hole of emptiness gets bigger. My cries seem to get worse. Is it because I have yet to find the root problem to my original pain? That my sadness keeps building up inside? I need help but no one seems to care, no one seems to be there. I try to keep positive but sometimes I don’t want to try and cheer my self up with ignorant lies. For I believe that nothing can make me feel better, than to fill the emptiness that I seem to have. I’m dying inside yet no one can see me wilt. My eyes revel sadness yet no one understands, because the pain I deal with rest inside me. You may see me cry, you may witness the tears, but you will not, cannot feel this pain that I’ve felt for so many years. I try to get up, and keep going with my life. I still ask though, where the road ends up? For if I control my destiny tell me why then I can’t control this pain inside me?

I watch the rainfall, and the sky turn black. My mind then asks more questions that I myself cannot answer. These unanswered questions leave me more confused than ever before. Life is a journey in which you shall endure the pain and the happiness. However if the happiness is seldom how shall you trudge on? You must look at life not as a conquest to find happiness but as a journey to learn from your mistakes, to overcome your sadness, to become stronger and capable of realizing your own true happiness. Being happy is a state of mind, its how you look at your own life. If your optimistic you ultimately feel better that if you looked at the situation being a pessimist. Look at your life as a journey and in this journey you shall become stronger, smarter and most importantly mentally grow. For is you can get along with others and understand different personalities, you your self will have grown. You will have achieved much in your journey, however there is still much more to undergo on your trip. Don’t go through life, grow through life.