We were young , I was in the sixth grade he was in the eighth grade . We had no idea what love was , or that it would last for so long . I had a crush on the older boy typically . He actually showed an interest in me . We dated , his friends used to call me by his last name I pretended to hate it but I really used to wish it were true . It was crazy the stuff we went through in those years . So many late night calls , I remember talking to him about everything from spelling bee's to his family and friends . We broke up more times than I can count . I always loved him . I was convinced I would be his forever , I met many people . I dated alot of people but I always wished he would change into the man I needed and wanted him to be . We remained friends through each year . It's been over eight years now and we have been on and off . He met my family so long ago they claim him as their own . He was there for me when I lost my dad . He was always there , like he was waiting . We tried again through highschool and it wouldn't work . Just before my graduation and his from basic training . I dropped my life , I gave up on my girlfriend at the time of two years , i quit my job and I skipped my graduation to go to his . He asked for my heart again and I told him it always belonged to him . I knew I was completely in love . After an amazing weekend in Texas from his graduation he couldn't come home before tech school and we wanted to make it work . He had a point in time where he was overly busy and I took it quite personal . I made a huge mistake . And thanks to one mistake I've lost him for good . So almost eight years of a friendship and on and off relationship through the years and I lost him all to one night . One stupid night . He will always have my heart and I truly believe we will work things out and I will be able to have his heart one last time . Who would've thought the young boy I crushed on in sixth grade would be the one man I don't feel as if I can live without now ? Everything reminds me of him , every song every couple . Everything , I miss him more than he will ever know . And I truly loev him more than he can understand . I'm overly sorry for what I've done and for hurting him , I wish that I could go back in time I wish I could change alot . But now I've lost him . And this time he doesn't want me back . I will wait . I will wait for him as long as it takes . He waited five years for me to take him back and I will wait as long as it takes . It will not be unless he is truly happy without me that I will let him go , If he finds happiness elsewhere then so be it , as long as I hear it from him . As long as he admits to me he is happier without me I will stop waiting for him to come back to me . Until that day . Shea , I will be waiting for you . I am willing to do whatever it takes to have your heart once more . For one last chance at your love . I love you with all my heart .