December 20th, 2007, is the day that I will never forget. It started off as any normal day would. I got up early in the morning, as I did every day for school. I got dressed, ate my breakfast, and got on the bus. I got to school and made my way to Mrs. Daly’s fourth grade class. I put my backpack in my locker, got my belongings, went into the classroom, and took my seat; waiting for our daily lesson to begin. I cannot fully remember what we learned that day because I was nine and I probably didn’t pay much attention anyway. The last thing I remember is going out to recess and having lunch. After lunch all I remember is my teacher getting a call and before I knew it I was walking down to the office for early dismissal. I thought it was kind of odd for my parents to be picking me in the middle of the day. They had never picked me up out of the blue, so it made me wonder what could be so important. At the time I really didn't think much of it; so I got my stuff and left. I was actually thrilled to be going home. Little did I know I would be getting the worst news of my life.

As I walked through the office doors the secretary kindly asked me to take a seat. I took a seat and after a few minutes of waiting I saw my neighbors walk into the office. They noticed me sitting in the chair and asked me what I was doing in the office. I told them that my parents were on the way to pick me up. They offered to give me a ride home from school, so they called my parents. After a few short minutes of them talking on the phone they finally came over to me and said, “Maybe some other time.” The one thing that confused me was when my neighbor said he was sorry and put his hand on my shoulder. I

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didn’t think “sorry” really meant anything at first. I could see a sense of depression in their facial expression, but because of how young I was I didn't think anything of it once again. I had no idea that they knew of one of the most devastating pieces of news I would ever get.

After waiting for about another five minutes my parents finally came through the offices doors to come get me. I ran to my father with joy and hugged him like any little kid would. He seemed to be very happy to see me. After he signed me out we went back to the car where my mom was waiting in the front seat. The entire car ride was very silent. No words, not even a gaze into the back seat from my parents to see if I had my seatbelt on. I noticed a picture faced down on the center console and I asked my mother about what it was. She said not to touch or worry about it. For the remainder of the car ride I was left to wonder about the mystery image.

We went to go pick up my sister from daycare, for she was only five. After we picked her up we went home. All of a sudden, my mom came into the living room and told us she needed to talk to us. She sat both my sister and I on the couch. My dad entered the room and kneeled on the ground next to my mom. She then began to tell me words that echo inside my head even to this day. “Nick, Amanda, you know grandpa loves you very much and would do anything for you. I have horrible news; grandpa is no longer with us.”

At that moment my heart sank. It took me a few seconds to actually realize what she had said, and the true meaning of it. I looked over at my dad who was crying. This was a weird sight to me because I have never seen my dad cry before. I always thought of my

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dad as invincible, someone who had no tears to cry. Then, it set in that my grandpa has actually died. I didn’t believe it at first and then I started breaking out into tears.



To this day that news has been the worst I have ever gotten. He had died from an unknown reason. They think that he might have died from a heart attack or stroke. It’s hard to cope when you don’t even know the reasoning behind a loved one's death. My grandpa was not just a grandpa to me; he was my best friend. He would do anything for me whenever I asked him and I would do the same for him. I try not to look at my grandfather’s death as a reason to sulk, or sink into a great depression. I try to think of all the positive things I can think of. He was diabetic; he had to deal will all the insulin shots every day and the inconvenience that came with it. He also had trouble breathing at night; he needed to sleep with an oxygen mask on. I still would do anything to get him back, but I know he is up in heaven living a healthy life. I know many people especially after losing someone as close as a grandpa would be broken for a very long time. I was not that way; instead I think of it this way: he no longer has to deal with the troubles of being diabetic and the trouble breathing at night. He no longer has to struggle day to day, which is more than I could ever ask for.







The day of the funeral was on Christmas Eve. This would be the most memorable Christmas for me ever. The day of the funeral was a very brisk winter day, typical for Connecticut. Before going to the funeral home my mom talked to me about how my

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grandpa wouldn’t look the same as before. I know why of this now, but at the time I thought she was being ridiculous saying that my grandpa would look different. When we got to the funeral home we were greeted by the owner who showed us to where my grandfather was. As we walked upstairs I started getting a nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach. As we were escorted to the room I immediately noticed the casket with my grandfather laying inside. I walked over to the casket and kneeled down to tell my grandpa my final farewells. “Grandpa, I love you more than anything in the world. I wish you were still with me, but I know you will always be looking over me,” I whispered to him. After a while more people started entering to pay their last condolences. It was then time for the service to begin. My family and I drove over to the Portuguese church where the funeral was held. It was my first funeral so I didn’t really know what was going on and it didn’t help that practically the entire mass was in Portuguese. During the funeral I looked up to the light glistening through the ceiling and I could see my grandfather’s face. He was smiling at me like he always did. My inspiration was literally watching over me. This was a sense of relief because now I know that my grandfather is up in heaven; safe and exultant.

After the mass was over it was time to head to the cemetery. The car ride seemed as though it would never end. Once we reached the spot where my grandpa would be laid to rest it hit me that I will never see him ever again. We took our seats next to the hole where my grandpa will be laid to rest. The priest continued on with the funeral ceremony; which I still didn’t understand much of. After he was done we were all given a rose to put

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on the casket. I walked up to the casket with the delicate rose; gripping on to it like a lifeline and broke out into tears. I put the rose on the casket; knowing this would truly be my last goodbye to my grandpa. After everyone got a chance to lay a rose on the casket they began to lower it into the ground. My whole family sat in our seats in tears as other family members and close family friends came over to give their last goodbyes to my grandpa. After everyone began to leave, my family and I got back into the car and drove off. I took a look back at the grave where my grandpa was and as we drove away I thought to myself, “I love you.”





Even though my grandpa is gone; he is always looking over me and I know he is proud of me. I always try my best in everything I do simply because I want to make him proud. He is the reason for my hard work in everything from school to sports. Before every game I say a prayer to him so he will be with me when I’m playing. He is why I will always give one hundred percent effort in anything I do and the last thing I want is to disappoint him. Even if I don’t do too well at something; I still know he is proud of me no matter what happens. To remember my grandpa every day I wear a gold necklace that he gave me at my Baptism. This is one of the only things I have left that he gave me and wearing the necklace is my way to always remember him. Without it I don’t feel like he is with me, its sentimental value is just too much to ever lose. I love my grandpa and although I would be ecstatic to have him here on Earth with me, he has a permanent place in my heart that can never be altered.