It may be small and tattered, but it connects me to my past; the light brown and powder blue stuffed bear, with two small black stitched eyes, and no mouth. It brings me joy when I am sad and security when I am alone. “Teddy”, I scream, as my small 6-year-old body runs around the house dragging him by his left leg. More or less, driving my parents crazy with my rambunctious attitude towards life. The tiny bear carries a sweet lullaby and is the only thing that I have had since the day of my birth, I have no intention of giving him up anytime soon. It’s the only comfort I can rely on every minute of the day, and through every long night.

As I look at my stuffed bear now, as a sixteen-year-old girl, I can see how simple my life used to be. Not worrying about deadlines and due dates, or about what lies ahead. The bear's simplistic features and blank stare into the world shows innocence, the unknown, not knowing anything about how troubling the world can be. Its part of the past I wish I still had. When all that I believed in, was what I could create from my own imagination, making every moment count, just being a kid. No violence, no killing, not even knowing the meaning of death. Where war was only a card game, and the only violence that I had ever witnessed was watching Sunday night football players and their constant battle to get to the end zone.

Unfortunately society pushes us out of that sheltered life of the not knowing, and into a world where violence occurs, kills are made, and death is something that happens in our daily lives. But we do not lose our childhood forever; it’s still inside of us all. Everything that has ever happened to us is what makes us who we are as human beings. Even something as little as me being comforted by my stuffed bear at a young age, affects how I behave in my daily life. If I never would have been given that bear, maybe I wouldn't be as level headed as I am now in sticky situations. It’s that bear that helped me control my emotions, I always had something to go back to, a constant, something that never changed. Having this consistency in my life has kept me in balance.
My bear stares blankly back at me; it reminds me constantly that I am still, and always will be connected to my childhood and I will continue to remember my past, no matter what lies ahead. The memories that were created then we will never forget and shape us to who we are today. We may know more about the world than we did, but deep down we all still have our innocence, clinging on to something we never want to let go.