“Did you hear?” Maddy asks me as we walk into PE class.

“About what?” I reply
“Chelsea,” Maddy said, sadness suddenly filling her voice.
“Yes, I can’t believe it. I just saw her a few weeks ago and all I said was a casual hello and waved.” I said, as I started to tear up.

Everything had just started sinking in. We headed outside for our weekly run. The air was brisk, almost as if it was sad too. I ran, breathing between sobs, and I could barely breath. I just couldn’t believe she was gone, and she was never coming back. Not only was I extremely sad; I was also mad.  I was Mad at God for letting her die, mad at myself because I never really got to say goodbye, just mad. How could God let this happen? She never did anything wrong and was a very strong christian. All she was trying to do was come home to see her family, but no, that one didn’t work out too well. These thoughts ran in circles through my head over and over again. Why her? Why on Earth did it have to be Chelsea Jean? I was so mad at the world, but what could I do now. I just wanted to scream! I just wanted to roll up into a ball, and get all the sadness and anger that what stirring inside of me out. I almost lost it while I was running but then I remembered that I was in the middle of gym class, I couldn’t do that. How could God let this happen? He’s supposed to make everything better. She had a whole life ahead of her, and now she never gets to live it. Why?  None of it makes sense. Why? Why? Why? These thoughts now became a part of the endless loop in my head. She was starting her career as a musician. She was a successful college student.

I had finally calmed myself down by the time we finished running, and my tears had stopped flowing down my face. I walked over to Maddy, and as soon as I saw the sadness in her eyes my eyes swelled up with tears. We suddenly fell into the embrace of each other’s arms. Then we found ourselves sitting on the ground our heads in our knees, sobbing. The substitute teacher probably thought we were insane and this was like an everyday thing for us, but it definitely wasn’t and never would be again. We had to stay outside for a while and it was awful. I couldn’t get myself under control for the rest of class. Maddy and I stayed my each other’s side, so we could feel the warm embrace of each other. When we are together we can feel Chelsea’s presence. Chelsea was like family to me, she was on swim team. My team is my family, they mean so much to me. When one team member goes down the entire team pays the toll.

We keep Chelsea in our hearts, always, and we will always remember her bright smile that lit up the world.