I've always been hated by some family members, and I hated them back, but I never let it get to me. At least that's how it used to go. Now I've got chains on me, chains that are binding me to what I hate most in this world: to be alone. These chains restrict my actions, and restrict my movements. I can't leave this place I call my home anymore, to be with those that make me feel loved and happy. I pull and tug at these chains but with every action against the chains will, they only become tighter, and tighter.

Back when I was truly alone, before I found the light, before the chains of darkness were suffocating the rekindled light in myself, I actually embraced the darkness. It was like a poison in my mind, effecting my thoughts, my actions, me as a whole, and I loved it. In some cases, if you're depressed for too long, it becomes a drug because your body adapts to it, so imagine that my body is as black as the deep dark areas of space.

There was no need for those chains of darkness to strangle me, yes, that was before I found my light. The light was as bright as a glimmering crystal. Reaching out, it came to me, and pulled me out of the dark abyss that held me down. As i ascended from the chasms of the abyss, I could smell something sweet and exotic. With light comes life, and I knew that the sweet smell of nature's beautiful air graced me with it's pressence. Sounds corny right? Yeah it does for me too, but I could describe it no better. You may think I'm saved, but sadly, I'm not. Did you know that the reason why people are afraid of the dark is because we don't know what can linger in their?

It's the perfect camoflauge for the darkest and most vile things that a person cannot comprehend, and from that same darkness I rose out of, the chains appeared. They catch my ankles, wrapping itself around and around, until it crushes all feeling I have in my lower limbs. Without light, there cannot be dark, and without dark, there cannot be light. Two very opposite forces were pulling me in two different directions, the hands of the light, with it's compelling grip on my fore-arm, and the chains of darkness, with it's excruciating metal, crushing what happiness I have left. What happens when two extreme forces crash?

Normally, you'd have an extreme reaction / action, and that is exactly what happened to me. I felt as if the old self I once was died, and something new took it's place, a product of both light and darkness. That is how I feel about myself today. In order to be two, you must be one with yourself, but how can you be one with yourself if you live in a world where you are pushed to be something else? Society pushes you to be what society thinks is "right", but isn't society itself corrupted?

Alas, that is a conversation for another topic and time. I have strayed too far from my path, and spoke too much nonsense. Please, don't think poorly of me, but when you've lived a life where you've been hated since a child, how would you be any different from me? What if you knew you were a mistake, and was never meant to be here? Would you be any different from me?