I did not know why my father was hollering for me once he walked through the front door after a long, tiring day at work. Had my dad found out about the disrespectful way in which I talked to my mother last night, when she demanded that I give her my phone at 10:15? Or was he going to congratulate me for my awesome grades for the first trimester of school?

I rushed to finish writing my last sentence, slammed the door behind me, and hustled down the flight of stairs. “Dad, where are you?” I yelled down from the banister.

“I’m at the kitchen table, come here for a sec” he said.

My dad slumped down in his chair and had his hand on his forehead. He glanced up at me with a doleful look on his face. His eyes became watery as he continued to scroll through his phone. I thought to myself, “Hmmm… what was he looking at that made him so upset?” In the twelve years of my life, I have never seen my dad this depressed. I slowly walked over to him and asked, “Dad, are you alright?”

He sighed and said, “Matty, I have to tell you some very unfortunate news.” I began to feel worried. My stomach was filled with butterflies and my hands began to tremble.

My dad said, “Coach Kirst… Coach Kirst passed away this morning.”

I did not know what to say or do. Tears began rushing out of my eyes and fled down my face. I felt as if someone stabbed me right in the heart. I believed that someone with such a great personality and a caring heart, like Coach Kirst, did not deserve to die. After I mourned over Coach Kirst’s death for a few minutes, my dad hugged me and said, “Look Matty, I know that this is really devastating for both you and I. He was a great man and it is really sad to see him go. Now, he is in a special place with our Father.”

I remember the dark and rainy afternoon when I first met Coach Kyle Kirst during practice for Leading Edge Lacrosse. He was very impressed with my aggressive style of play and the way I dodged hard to the goal. He was a great coach that critiqued my game and shaped me to become the lacrosse player that I am today. I remember Coach Kirst yelling from the sidelines, “Johnson, stop doing the cha cha and run north/south.” I also remember him pulling me aside after practice one day and saying, “Matt, I want to see you start dodging lefty to take your game to the next level. With lots of practice and experiences with Coach Kirst, I improved the overall performance of the team. As one of his most talented players, he invited me to play for Somerset Hills Lacrosse Club the following spring season. Today, I look back at the things he said to me and still wish he was here.
A few days after Coach Kirst’s death, I was scrolling through social media and saw that a memorial was built in memory of him. A week later, I was watching a Rutgers lacrosse game and saw that all the players had “Kirst” written on the back of their jerseys which was truly remarkable. I began tearing up and came to a realization about the huge impact he had on many people’s lives, including me. Coach Kirst was not only a great coach, but a mentor to me. He did not only help me become a better lacrosse player, but a better person overall by showing acts of kindness and respect towards others. I enjoyed his enthusiasm and passion that he brought to practice everyday. Although he is gone and rests in peace, his words of advice will always hold a special place in my heart.