The discord of metals rubbing together to lift our garage door woke me up from a sound sleep. Still in a daze, I sat up and began to mindlessly gather my things to go inside. It was late. I didn’t care to take my vitamins or brush my teeth; all I wanted was the comfort of my red pillow under my head. I dragged my limp body up to my room and crashed onto my bed. I slept so deep and dreamt the wildest dreams. The bitter-sweet problem with dreams, though, is they never last long enough. We periodically wake up wishing we were back asleep, back in that moment. Sometimes I lay there thinking of all the things I would do, if I could just lay back down and fade back into the remnants of that dream. It’s sad, to me, how quickly a dream slips from our mind’s grasp. You’d think something of such idolization would have a lasting impact. But, alas, in a moment of time, from slumber to wake, everything changes.
The day before, we had dropped off my twin sisters, Jill and Jeni, at college. I was twelve-years-old and couldn’t wait to have the house to myself. Nobody bossing me around. Nobody to share the bathroom with. No more having to hide all the good food my mom buys so they wouldn’t eat it. Selfish, right? Well, think what you want but I did what I had to do to survive the wrath of three older sisters. With all of them away at college, it was finally going to be my time.

I believe there is a melody for everything in life. Music helps ease life’s transitions for me, for instance when my sisters left for college. All of my life I have found a way to be continually left in awe because of it. Every song played, every lyric written, every note sung; I’m amazed. Music holds great power for me; I didn’t realize how much music impacted me until, in my times of trouble, I found myself recalling lyrics to get me through. It became my therapy, and in a weird way, my best friend. Which is only possible because of its diversity, its acceptance, and its ability to change things.
My sisters and I didn’t always get along the greatest. Eryn was eight years older than I, and the twins were six. The definite age gap between us didn’t help the problem. Nonetheless, they were my role models and I wanted more than anything to be like them. Along with the difference in age, there was also a difference in understanding. I had yet to learn the mind of a teenager going into college and much to my disappointment, I think they had simply forgotten what it was like to be younger. Over time, the excitement of their absence simmered into a dull ache. I began to mature and grow up. I was going through things that I wanted my sisters to be going through with me. But they were at a different chapter in their lives and although they tried to be there for me, and I for them, things were different. Everything changed immensely. And it was all out of our control.
Luckily, a man named David Bowie was there to help get me through. Bowie was a unique man with incredible insights on the world. A few years back I discovered his voice. Every song of his was different. One song in particular struck me. Ch-ch-ch- changes, turn and face the strange. (David Bowie - Changes Lyrics) The lyrics sounded so clear to me. Time may change me, but I can’t trace time. A definition to each their own, but the way I interpreted it was that change is inevitable. As scary and as strange as it may seem at first, I cannot waste the time fighting it. Instead, I should be embracing it in all its beauties. And these children that you spit on, as they try to change their worlds… don’t tell them to grow up or out of it. Society has a strong opinion on what we should be. Bowie’s lyrics in this song inspire me to knock down road signs telling me who I am on this journey of life. Change doesn’t encourage us to conform, it promotes confidence to try something new. I am, undoubtedly, going to be me. And maybe the me six years ago is different from the me now. That’s okay, too, because change is what makes life interesting. Music changes all the time. Artists are constantly coming up with new chords and rhythms to write to. It’s all about taking chances and trusting the changes that come with it.

My life’s melody transitioned during that time. My sisters and I are close now. Probably closer than we had ever been while living under the same roof. In the last year, two of the three got engaged. Yay! Right? Yes, I am so unbelievably happy for them. However, with marriage comes: alternating holidays between families, the beginning of their own families, and a whole lot of other changes. It’s a huge pill to swallow. My instinct is to hold onto them for as long as possible because I know what it’s like to have them leave. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to have them leave Park Rapids for good. Their rooms empty, leaving our basement vacant. I am still young and going through all these new and scary decisions that I want to have them here for. Still so selfish, right? I guess some things never change.
The first Christmas without one of them home will be odd. The moment they start to pop out kids will be even weirder, but letting these changes stop me from living life happy and full of love, well that would just be straight up stupid. I try, every day, to wake up and face the strange. What will come about of this new adventure in front of me. I get two brothers for starters! One day, I’ll be an auntie (the young hip one, of course.) Without change we would be living in a continuous loop. How boring! When I face changes, I am simply developing into who God intended me to be. It’s about time I start waking up from strange dreams, with an open mind that my life will most likely be just as strange. And thank goodness David Bowie has 35 other albums to get me through it. (Erlewine, Stephen Thomas, David Bowie album discography)

Works Cited
“Change.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/change.
“David Bowie - Changes Lyrics.” David Bowie - Changes Lyrics | MetroLyrics, www.metrolyrics.com/changes-lyrics-david-bowie.html.
Erlewine, Stephen Thomas. “David Bowie | Album Discography.” AllMusic, www.allmusic.com/artist/david-bowie-mn0000531986/discography.