Metal Mouth

Today I was going to the dentist for the first time in a while. My cousin is a dentist, and I am going to her clinic to get a cavity issue fixed. At least that’s what I thought. I ring the bell, and someone opens the door.  I wait about five minutes until someone calls my name. I go to another room and see Seri waiting for me. I jump in her arms and hug her. 

“Zemra how have you been?” She says.

 
“Good how about you?” I ask. 

“Super,” she says, "Let's get started.” 

She numbs and then drills my teeth. We were done in less than 15 minutes. We were talking before I left, and Seri suddenly mentioned, “So when do you want to get your braces on?” 

I gave her a weird look and asked, “What are you talking about?” 

“Mom told me that you finally decided to get braces! I'm so excited for you.” 

I rolled my eyes. I can’t believe my mom had done it again. She had said something without my permission, about me! It got me so aggravated, and I didn’t know what to tell Seri. 

“I don’t know Ser, but I'll let you know soon.” I answered. 

I left the clinic and immediately went home and talked to my mom. She scheduled my appointment for tomorrow. After school ended, we immediately drove to the clinic and my driver dropped me off there. Seri excitedly opened the door and gave me a big hug. She saw that I was a bit scared, and she said,“Don’t worry hun, it’s not going to be painful.” 

“I don’t care about the pain Ser, I just want to look good.” I sighed.

 
“You will look fine. Promise.” She said, “Come this way now.” 

The clinic smelled like fresh hand sanitizer, and it was all blue and white. It really reminded me of a hospital. I sat down in one of those big dentist chairs. “Open wide.” Seri said.

She had these metal box-type things that would surround your molars. She stuck one on my first molar and I felt a sharp pain. It hurt so much. Then went the next one. A tear trickled down my cheek and my mouth was in pain.

“Why did I ever agree to do this?” I said to myself. 

About 30 minutes later, we were finally done. One of the dentists who put on my braces gave me a mirror to look at myself. I held the mirror in my hand and held it straight up to my face. If I didn’t smile, you really couldn’t notice. My molars were aching of tremendous pain, but I still managed to smile because I didn’t look as bad as I had imagined. I thanked everybody and left the clinic with my mom, wearing a big smile on my face.  

Even now that it has been a while since I got my braces and I am used to them, I still remember the pit feeling when I found out I had to get braces. Even though you might think feeling bad about braces is stupid, it's not. Body image refers to the way people perceive themselves. They are insecure about parts of themselves and often compare to others. People worldwide wear braces and I've heard many of my friends' getting comments about how ugly they look with braces. It's not only that, also things like social media make people compare themselves to other and trying to be perfect. These things lead to serious things like depression, eating disorders, and suicide.  

Bullying is also something that affects body image. I have gotten some comments such as, “you looked way better without braces,” or, “braces don’t suit you.” These things were stuck in my mind repeatedly especially because I was worried that this would happen. This happens more frequently with things like fat and skinny shaming. These things have influenced teenagers so much and they all want to fit in the body standard which is crazy perfect. Nobody is expected to look that way, but social media convinces us differently.  

According to medicalnewstoday body image is “how an individual sees their own body and how attractive they feel themselves to be.”  Body image is affected by beauty standards. Beauty standards change from decade to decade. Some years ago, the beauty standards would be having thin brows and now the beauty standard is having thick brows. People usually compare their appearances to beauty standards, therefore, affecting their body image.  If people do not fit the beauty standards, they don’t find themselves attractive. Not fitting the beauty standards has been a problem since the beginning of time. Personally, I have suffered from not fitting the beauty standards. 

Some weeks ago, I had to put braces on, because I don’t have the most perfect teeth. Of course, in a perfect world I would either have perfect teeth or I would love myself with my natural teeth. The beauty standards have had an impact on me pushing me to put on braces. I would rather spend 1-2 years with braces than a lifetime with teeth that don’t fit the beauty standard. We have been growing up with these beauty standards even though we don’t understand it. One example is me growing up watching “Patito Feo”. The tittle literally translates to “Ugly Patito”. Patito had glasses and braces and her competition didn’t have neither braces nor glasses. Putting braces on, I feel like Patito who was always judged by her looks. She would always get bullied.  
After overthinking my body image and putting on braces I am now used to my looks, but I know that people might not think the same. When I say that to myself, I wonder what pretty means. My friends always reassure me and tell me I look pretty, but I must work on believing it. I know self – esteem is important. Loving yourself is the first step to loving others and that explains its importance. I really want to love myself but there are days where all I can see is what is wrong with my face and body.  

After all these experiences with body images I have some suggestions, I remind myself every time I feel down. I try to go out without makeup so I can learn to love my bare face. I try to smile I lot so I can show my braces and embrace them. I try to eliminate any negative thought whenever I can and only say positive things about myself. I have now learned that whatever energy I release to the people around me, about myself, they will also have that energy towards me. That means that anytime I believe I fit the beauty standards so does everyone around me. It is hard loving yourself but on this journey of my life that is the most important step.