To a Friend | Teen Ink

To a Friend

November 27, 2013
By rachel_rr14 SILVER, Glen Allen, Virginia
rachel_rr14 SILVER, Glen Allen, Virginia
6 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Life can&#039;t ever really defeat a writer who is in love with writing, for life itself is a writer&#039;s lover until death--fascinating, cruel, lavish, warm, cold, treacherous constant.&quot;<br /> Edna Ferber


Dear Ex-best friend,

Hi. I know you haven’t spoken to me in over six months, but I wanted to say something to you. I couldn’t do it face to face (believe me if I could I would) because I know you wouldn’t listen. You haven’t liked me for a while now, and it took me almost a year to figure that out. You wanted to be popular, so you did what you thought was right: dissing me.

Yes, I sat with you and all of my now other ex-best friends, but you didn’t really want me there. I could tell even then that you were different. At lunch I would have to instigate the conversations and keep them going, as you replied with as little as possible. I often started at your golden brown hair most of the lunch, as you talked to your best friend.

In Elementary School, no one cared if you were fat or skinny, pretty or ugly, small or tall, or anything else. Everyone was friends with everyone. In those days, it was normal for someone to go up to a classmate and ask to be friends with them. Now it’s just plain weird.

I understand that people change and we grow up and mature, but I didn’t want to lose you and I’m not writing you a hate letter, I really am not. I’m also not trying to be a martyr, but it has taken me this long to realize you don’t want me as a friend anymore, and I am accepting that, slowly but surely. I also wrote this letter to thank you.

Thank you for being by my side all throughout the lazy days of Elementary school, the days where we did each other’s hair, slept over at each other’s houses, and giggled about cooties. You were there for me as I went through some of the hardest and most trying times in my life, and most of all, you taught me to spread my wings.

Yes, our friendship is over, and yes, it really hurts me to see you hanging out with all your popular friends and not even looking at me. However, I learned a lot from you in the five years of our friendship (six, if you count the year I still thought we were friends). You taught me how to live. You showed me it was okay to take risks and be who I wanted to be. You knew all my secrets and aspirations, and you encouraged me to fly.

Those five years were some of the best years of my life. Thanks for a great friendship and I’m sorry that popularity was more important to you than me. Maybe someday you’ll realize this and hopefully the people you hurt along your climb to the top of the mountain. I have made new friends through you, so thanks for that too.

In the end, I knew our friendship wouldn’t last forever. Even though I used to fantasize about us living across the streets from each other when we were sixty years old, I knew that, realistically, deep down, that wouldn’t happen. It has been hard, getting over our friendship. I thought about trying to forget it, but when you forget one person who you knew for six years, so many lessons and memories are washed away too. Every day at school, I look at you, and I’m glad you’re happy, because in the end, I still want to be a good friend and all that matters to me is that you’re happy. You probably think that this letter is weird. I KNOW you are thinking it, but I’m not trying to profess my feelings to you. I’m not a lesbian, like I overheard you once telling someone. I merely want you to know how much you meant to me at one point.

So thanks again. Thanks for making me laugh and being there for me for six years. I am really sorry you thought popularity was more important than a meaningful friendship, but I just hope you realize how wrong you were before you make another bad decision. Be careful.

Love always,

A friend. A very good friend.


The author's comments:
I was inspired to write this piece when I went through a really hard time when my best friend "dumped me." She was my rock for years, and to have her totally ditch me...well, it wasn't easy for me to comprehend. This is for all those out there who have felt these same emotions.

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