Yesterday, I saw the sun set at the beach. It was a real show of colours. Orange and yellow and purple. The bright outline, the sea bellow. I t was beautiful, and it made me think of you. Not, that this is weird because, I mean a lot of things make me think of you. But, watching this sunset, watching the orange turn purple, almost violet, which was always your favourite colour, for a moment I thought it had all been a dream. I thought you were still here, standing on the same earth as I do.
It was Saturday, so in that special moment I even wondered at what time I should visit you tomorrow, as I always did. The moment passed, the fraction of second gone, along with that beautiful sunset. Leaving me with a beautiful contemplation of a sky without the sun, still waiting for the moon to wake up and pop up from its window. And, surprisingly, I blurt out a laugh, one of those loud ones you always laughed at me about.
I looked down at the sea and I started wishing for the hundredth time I had known you better. I wished you had taught me how to play chess, like you did to my mother, or taken me to the beach like you did to uncle Mike. I wish I could’ve known you when they called you “the prettiest girl in Coimbra”. I wish I remembered when you held me in your arms, when I was so innocent and I did not know the privilege it was, like you did in that picture I hold so close with me. But under all these “I wish’s” I’m also happy you remembered my name until the end, I’m thankful I was able to hold your hand and comfort you when things got tough. I’m proud to have seen that sunset and remember your smile, how it lit up your eyes. Your laughter, how it lit up an entire room. My blood will always connect me to you, my love will always establish a bound between us.
You’re gone, and I miss you like crazy and I regret a thousand things I never said to you. But we laughed together, we sat together, we held each other at different points of our lives. So it was all worth it and I hope you’re up there, beating God at chess, walking with your purple umbrella under your arm waiting, waiting because you still have a lot of people that love you coming to you.
I hope someday I can see you again. And I hope someday someone sees a sunset as colourful as the one I saw yesterday and thinks of me, for all the goods and for all the “bads”.
You will always be remembered and loved. You left a legacy that will go through generations. You left a memory that will run through the face of the Earth fiercely as long as I stand, conscious on my feet. So that when the time comes, and I fall, I fall quickly, right into your arms again