Goals vs Expectations

A couple of days ago, I was watching videos online.
I stumbled across one called ¨Why low expectations are good¨, by Jenna Marbles.
She, in humorous ways, explained how high goals are important, but high expectations could slow down your life, and could possibly cause you to miss out on important opportunities that could change everything.
And it left me thinking about the raw truth to her statement.
This past year I've been thinking a lot about my future, at the age of 13.
I decided that I was going to become a successful OB GYN, because my dad told me being a doctor is a dream job.
I set all of these crazy expectations; I would graduate from Western and work with a group at a local hospital. I would take off certain days so I could spend time with my two children (yeah I went a little crazy), and I would retire when needed and spend the rest my life with my husband somewhere tropical, like hawaii.

I became extremely stressed out from this, because I realized maybe spending my whole life in a hospital wasn't what I really wanted, but it's what my dad wanted. He didn't put a lot of pressure on me to become a doctor, he was just trying to show me some things that he wanted for me, and that maybe I could possibly want for my life, but while doing so he really stressed me out.
I would think about it all day and into the night. Right before I fell asleep was usually the most I would think about it.

My future. I could do whatever I wanted. Anything was possible.
This continued for months, and the stress got worse and worse.
But then I watched this video, and my whole view changed.
I was doing it all wrong.
Having a goal of becoming a doctor is one thing, but planning your life around this future you've drawn out for yourself is another.

Say at highschool, I take all of the necessary courses for a OB GYN, but for an easy extra credit, I take visual arts.
While there, earning my needed credit, I learn that I am actually kind of naturally talented at say, drawing.
So I've learned that I'm pretty good at drawing, and my teacher even says ¨Wow, you could make a career out of this.", but I'm too busy on my set life to even think about it. After I graduate, the quiet art teacher tells me that she can get me into a prestigious art school, and can get me an amazing professor that will get this into a great career for me. So I'm basically being handed this amazing future life, but because I'm so blinded on becoming an OB GYN, I kindly decline and go back to study baby delivery for the rest of my life.

Now I'm not saying that people should live their life with no thought. That'll just end with someone working at mcdonald's, or begging for money on the streets.
I'm saying you have to think of life as unpredictable. Bad things happen. Things will come up out of no where, but they need to teach you. The twists on the road of life should always lead you into a different direction.
People who learn from their mistakes and take issues as challenges are the truly successful people. It doesn't matter what they're doing, as long as they take every opportunity to grow from that issue, they will take their life far.

There’s a difference between people who think they have to work for things on this earth, and people who think the world owes them something.
Take my uncle for example, he spent his teenhood doing drugs and playing guitar in some stupid band, and now he lives in his mom’s basement complaining about how my dad got his life handed to him. But in reality while he was doing drugs, my dad was studying.
That’s why my dad has the kids, and the car, and the house, and the money.
It’s scary to think of my uncle hating my dad for being successful, but it just shows how if you think things will happen for you while you sit back, nothing will go your way. And you’ll end up being that one person in the family who always gets invited to family events because everyone else just feels bad for them.
My uncle had high expectations. He thought if he just sat back, and enjoyed the ride, everything would work out his way.
But that isn’t the case.

He should have had goals to become something great, and work towards those goals everyday, until he earned the opportunity to do something with everything he’s learned.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that people have to understand the difference. It’s crucial in the path of life.
Goals are setting things for you to aspire to do or to be. And working towards them is how people discover things that they’re good at. Taking resources you’ve learned from studying or doing, and using those resources and knowledge towards future projects is how to be successful.
Expectations are thinking that something is just going to happen. People get trapped in fantasies of how their lives are going to be like, and end up living forced and unhappy lives. Thinking something will just “turn out” is a false way of viewing the world. You’ve gotta put in the effort to get the results.

So yeah, I've kind of ditched the whole idea of becoming an OB. I mean it would be pretty cool to bring babies into this world, but I have no idea what I am actually passionate about or good at yet.
I’m going to set goals, and work towards them.
I’ll prove myself to others. I’ll do everything I can to achieve my goals.
And, when the quiet metaphorical art teacher offers me something that could change my life, I’ll take it in a heartbeat.

And so should you.