If I kissed you... | Teen Ink

If I kissed you...

March 20, 2012
By KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown


Summary:

The killer turned his head to me, his dark, chiseled face giving me a small grin. “I'm going to kill your weak little boyfriend.” he breathed, trying to get me to react. I did, not caring, shaking my head no, pleading with my eyes.
“Hah!” he laughed at me and wrapped his large hands around John's throat. Tears streamed down my face. “NO! NO!”
And then the shears were planted into his shoulder. He let out a roar of anger as he fell back, off John his head landing near my feet. I raised my feet and landed them, hard as I could on his skull. His head re-vibrated off the floor boards and settled back as his eyes slowly closed. John ran to me ripping off the tape, I screamed from the pain. “John he's tied us all up! Get the shears, baby, get the shears!”


Katherine A.

If I kissed you...


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This book has 130 comments.


KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 17 2012 at 5:12 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

I love your comment so much! Your comment just made my whole week-Thank you! Jeez, I feel like commenting on every PIECE of your work now, I think I will, ;-D

on Apr. 17 2012 at 5:47 am
NamesKill. BRONZE, Plymouth, Other
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
One of my favourites is......<br /> <br /> &#039;Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don&#039;t matter and those who matter don&#039;t mind.&#039;<br /> - Dr. Seuss

Usually I don’t really read this sort of thing, but today has been an exception.

This is AMAZING!!... I saw your thread about reading only two pages and that was my intention but I couldn't help but continue reading this wicked novel.

You so need to write part three & continue the story!...
I particularly like the way you use repetition of words, it familiarises the reader with the text and allows for them to be reminded and recall previous parts that they have already read. The flashback use is brill, I loved the way they just seamlessly blended into each other and you could tell that they were in there for a reason, not because you just thought it to be a good idea at the time.

Plot is well written, the characters are great, the setting is described with ease, the suspense kept me on edge… I don’t think I could have asked for much more and of course 5/5!!

Thank you for allowing me to read this book, NamesKill. :)


on Apr. 13 2012 at 8:17 pm
sherrinford SILVER, Hong Kong, Other
8 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
People die all the time.

Here I am! 

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 13 2012 at 5:26 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

I found a fiction article called 'Two of a kind' but not written by Sherrinford H., just give me your current screen name on here and I can find it in a flash to rate/comment for you, okay? :-)

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 13 2012 at 5:20 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you! I love your comment so much :-) You just made my day!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 13 2012 at 5:18 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

 Thank you very much! :-)

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 13 2012 at 5:13 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

No problem-I'll go looking for it right now :)

on Apr. 13 2012 at 8:18 am
dragonfly95 SILVER, Argaon, Georgia
7 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
&#039;&#039; there is nothing to fear but fear its self&#039;&#039;

its good, with a few minor tweaks it would be awsome! i loved how imaginative it was and your characters are well developed, i couldnt stop reading! i read the entire thing :) i can totally see this asa published peace of work and best seller, you obviuosly have tremendous talent! :) and thanks for your awsome comment on my article ''a mother's love'' :)

on Apr. 13 2012 at 8:02 am
Thanks for offering! I just recently became a member and my book's called Two of a Kind. It's written by Sherrinford H.

on Apr. 13 2012 at 5:09 am
compassion GOLD, Nowhere, Other
12 articles 17 photos 153 comments

Favorite Quote:
Expect to have hope rekindled,expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways! The dry seasons in life do not last,the spring rains will come again.

 sry no time to read the entire thing. but looking at the summary i already love the story!i will make time and will enjoy every word of your writing:)

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2012 at 5:38 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Oh yeah-I can see at first how it might be a little confusing, but then it says she wraps her arm around the killer's neck, so I'm not too concerned. But I do know that I should edit this first part because it also says that John's body is 'teenage' and lank-but he's actually in his twenties-oopsies, lol. 

on Apr. 12 2012 at 6:44 am
augustsun02 SILVER, Hamburg, New Jersey
9 articles 0 photos 76 comments

Favorite Quote:
Write. It doesn&#039;t matter if you&#039;re overjoyed, furious, miserable, or what. Write to keep those emotions in check while managing to grow stronger.

This was really really good. There was one part that really confused me though. It was when John and the main girl were fighting their captor. The way your main character was talking, I couldn't tell if she was attacking John or their captor. Other than that I absolutely LOVED it!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2012 at 2:38 am
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Oh you commented! Thank you! :-)

on Apr. 12 2012 at 2:30 am
SweetSandyFlower GOLD, Amarillo, Texas
14 articles 0 photos 45 comments

Favorite Quote:
Not everyone has to go to college because ..hello!.. PIZZAS DONT DELIVER THEMSELVES!!!!

love this work. very good.

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2012 at 1:29 am
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

I really like your comment :-D Thank you!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2012 at 1:28 am
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 11 2012 at 5:43 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Thank you! :-)

on Apr. 11 2012 at 6:31 am
sherrinford SILVER, Hong Kong, Other
8 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
People die all the time.


on Apr. 11 2012 at 3:45 am
TheMusicNeverStopped96 BRONZE, Cincinnati, Ohio
2 articles 2 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I believe that marriage isn&#039;t between a man and woman, but between love and love.&quot; Frank Ocean

I loved reading this, amazing work! It was very well written and I couldn't stop reading it, great job!

KateLA GOLD said...
on Apr. 10 2012 at 6:43 pm
KateLA GOLD, Everett, Washington
11 articles 20 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don&rsquo;t you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?<br /> -Unknown

Oh good-that part of about them possibly being related was something I'd been wondering about. I was worried I had made the plot too twisted, but I'm glad you liked it. That was a flashback-with them dancing in the car on their way to their destination across the Nevada desert-and I know the flashbacks can be confusing for some people. As for the moment they got caught, I thought I'd include it as another flashback at a crucial moment in the character's (Kim's) survival to make it more intense. I don't think the plot is loose...but we all have our own opinions and I respect your's :-)

By the way, if you're a member on here and want me to comment on a piece of your work, just say so, and I'll return the favor.