Recently I have noticed a steep decline in gentlemanly behavior in the high school environment. I see this every day, with boys teasing, harassing, and even “playfully” hitting girls. Just the other day I was sitting in the hall working on a project with a female classmate. As we worked, she was greeted by three boys. Now, when I say greet, I don't mean saying “Hello” or “How are you?” They greeted her by kicking or hitting her in a playful matter, but I heard her say “Ow” more than once. I had to ask, “Why do you let them do that to you? Don't you want to be treated with respect?” It seems that nowadays boys forget that being a gentleman is still the proper way to treat girls.

If you look back to the roaring 1920s, you see entirely different manners between men and women. Wo-men were treated with the respect and dignity they deserve. Men would open doors, pull out chairs, and generally act like gentlemen. Over time, however, those customs have become myths. Nowadays, men treat women like dirt. We can't let good manners slip from our memory.

So, for the average teenage boy, here are some qualities you need in order to be a gentleman.

Educated: So you won't appear stupid when you try to have an intelligent conversation on a date or in an everyday environment.

Compassionate: Girls like it when you're there not only for them but others around you.

Humble: It's okay to be proud of what you have worked hard for, but don't overdo it. Otherwise you'll look like a jerk.

Reliable: If you tell someone you will do something, follow through. Be reliable not only for the girl in your life but your friends too.

Patient: Relationships take time to develop. Remember, not everything is given to you on a silver platter.

Gentle: The root of “gentleman” is gentle, and that's how you should be with girls.

Respectful: Girls deserve guys who open the door for them and let them go first. If you don't respect them, they won't respect you.

Not only does gentlemanly behavior pertain to being around girls, but guys too. We should treat our fellow gentlemen with respect and support them, because we need to help each other. Does this mean that you start pulling the chair out for your buddies? No, but you can help them by supporting them when life stinks (as it often does). Also you can set an example for how to be a gentleman by acting like one around them.

There is another thing that guys need to help us become better gentlemen. We need girls to have higher expectations of us. We need them to demand respect and remind us that they are important. Most of all, they shouldn't put up with being harassed or smacked around.

In conclusion, there are times for fun and roughhousing with girl friends, but mainly we need to grow up, be men, and start acting like the gentlemen girls deserve. Too often we forget that a girl we may treat horribly is somebody's daughter and (this is a scary one) will one day be someone's wife.

“A gentleman has his eyes on all those present; he is tender toward the bashful, gentle toward the distant, and merciful toward the absent.”




– Lawrence G. Lovasik

Guys, it's time to grow up.