Lying parallel to the lights
Across the tracks
The lights came ever so closer
In my mind nothing made sense...
If they loved me, then why'd they hurt me?
If they cared,then why'd they leave?
I'm not beautiful enough.
I'm not small enough.
Maybe if I'll change...
That was eons ago, before the disease---
the problem I had with eating.
Before I wouldn't eat,before I'd eat enough to be sick(never nauseous,just drowning out their words)...
Before I stopped caring, and before I stayed to myself...
That was all before and this is now...
Now I lay here, parallel to the lights,and the lights are coming closer...
And in the sudden rush of silence--
someone cares enough to reach out a hand
and lay down beside me to watch
the train go by.