You make me feel like I’m falling into a black hole. 

It consumes me and everything that I ever wished 

I could be. 

You make me feel like I’m falling into nothing. 

I’m becoming what you think I am. 

The nothingness consumes my entire mind; 

my thoughts and hopes and dreams. 

You make me feel like I’m falling off of a ledge. 

I’m trying so desperately to hang on but 

you pull me down. 

I just want up. 

You make me feel like I’m curling into a ball. 

I can no longer hold it in, 

I feel like I’m dying. 

You make me choke on my own judgment, 

my own comparisons. 

I’ll never amount to 

ANYTHING. 

You make me feel so suffocated with words. 

You make me fall into a pit. 

You surround me in tears; 

you bathe me in sorrow. 

My face is turning purple 

and you are turning red with excitement. 

You are deteriorating my bones 

and polluting my blood. 

Can I please take a break?

Can I please sleep and forget your existence? 

I can’t support my body anymore. 

I’m so determined to place the blame 

upon someone else

that I forget 

You are me.

I feel the blood pouring out of my body 

and I can’t put it back in. 

I just don’t want to die yet.

-02/01/24