The wild animals had scattered his bones through these canyons.
No one knew why.
Why do people jump?
Is it the rush, the air, the wind
filling lungs like a helium balloon,
the moment of flight,
the split of freedom,
going out with a bang-
Men tend to be more drastic about the expiration
the self termination of life.
Suicide is a last statement,
a stamp on the forehead of your soul "This is who i am!"
So men hang themselves,
shoot themselves,
jump off the edge of a canyon,
to be scattered by coyotes
and vultures
and bugs.
women o.d. on sleeping pills,
drifting away into oblivion.
at night in my dreams
a silhouette against a sunset colored sky
haunts me,
with wooden scaffolding on a grassy hill,
a carefully made noose swings
waiting,
to hang me for some heinous crime
i have no memory of committing.
When i wake, before the dream fades,
like these poor women with their sleeping pills,
I lie terrified and relieved in the same breath.
After the panic passes,
I fall back asleep
and dream of wild animals
running 'round juniper bushes
scattering fingers and toes and tidbits of dreams
into the mouths of their young.