Him and all of me | Teen Ink

Him and all of me

October 31, 2018
By dragonflys GOLD, Hartland, Wisconsin
dragonflys GOLD, Hartland, Wisconsin
10 articles 0 photos 0 comments

My finger hovers over the block button

I know it’d be the right thing to do

Cause all he does is hurt me

Cause all he does is use me

And I know it, I know all of it.


So why can’t I just press it, it seems so simple

why can’t I do it.

He’s killing me slowly every day

from the dirty looks in the hall.

To the way he makes me feel so special one night

and then pushes me to the side like I’m nothing the next.


I’ve given him so much, so much of me, so much of

my soul, and so much of my time and I can never get that back.  

He gives me so little, almost nothing.


I know that letting go will hurt,

but letting him stay is only hurting me more.

So why can’t I just let go,

Leave him,

get him out of my life.

He's toxic for me

thoughts of him, memories of him constantly running laps around my head.

My heart tightens every time I hear his name

I love him even though I should hate him.


There is a certain pain that hurts worse than any other.

The pain of endlessly loving someone you know will never love you back.

 

Sometimes he blocks me and it feels like I've lost something

Someone

Who wasn't even mine ….

I can't just let go

I've put so much of my time into one person

Although I get nothing in return


I can say all these bad things about him

Yet, I still come crawling back anytime he wants me

I'm wrapped around his finger

That is exactly how he wants it


I don't want to feel like this anymore

Showing him all of me

only to get left on read or never talked to.


Hurting me once again

to spend endless nights crying myself to sleep

All Because of Him

He's ruined the way I think

The way I feel


Anytime he's around me I’m filled with a sense of panic

And I can't stop myself

I just want to run into the bathroom and cry

But even if I tried I know that no tears would come out

And I would just sit and stare

As I feel myself slowly break

Into a million pieces



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