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the mercilessness of time, as the years slip away
i spent my life wasting it
two, four, six, eight years
the years ticked by, rapid like seconds
ten, twelve, fourteen, sixteen years
i laughed, but did not show my dimples; i smiled, but did not show my teeth
eighteen, twenty, twenty-two, twenty-four years
i said i was fine, i pretended to be, i shut out the world
twenty-six, twenty-eight, thirty, thirty-two
but sometimes, i laid awake at night and prayed for a miracle
thirty-four, thirty-six, thirty-eight, forty years
you never saw the tears, never felt the throbbing heartache that burned my soul
forty-two, forty-four, forty-six, forty-eight years
wait, don't let my life end, it’s not my time
fifty, fifty-two, fifty-four, fifty-six years
stop the clock, let me take my life back
fifty-eight, sixty, sixty-two, sixty-four years
why did you never hear me crying out? i needed you
sixty-six, sixty-eight, seventy, seventy-two years
where you always there? was i the ignorant one all along?
seventy-two, seventy-four, seventy-six, seventy-eight years
wait, no, i never saw you in my darkness, i never saw your light
eighty, eighty-two, eighty-four, eighty-six years
how did i miss it all, how was i so blind
eighty-eight, ninety, ninety-two, ninety-four-
stop the clock, stop it. if this is the last thing i say before i die, i want you to know i'm sorry
for everything. all my mistakes. you've always waited for me. i wish i had listened to your quiet
whispers to my broken, bleeding heart. i'd been hurt my whole life. i've done things i'm not
proud of. i wanted to trust you, but i was afraid. is it too late to say yes?
ninety-six, ninety-eight, one hundred years.
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This is a poem about a woman who has spent her whole life hoping for an answer, only to find that God was reaching out His hand the whole time. And in the end, she finds peace.