When I was younger, 

You would take me somewhere only we knew

Bring me to the waterfall

Its blue stream reigned infinite

a younger me: laughing, smiling, playing,

Enamored with possibility

Sore legs dangling from the tire seat staring in the sunset 

Running through sultry mud, gliding with no apparent stop

You smile and laugh and hold me close- we look at the water

A whole, clear reflection of us 

I wish I could jump in and catch it

So I blow out those birthday candles every year

Wishing for that same, long-gone image

Wax dripping pink, flames flickering an unsure red

Close my eyes, make a wish

I wish we could start over

I remember the day you yelled at me, I knew you wished for the perfect daughter- with perfect grades, and perfect hair, 

and perfect dreams and not having to suffer under the pressure of

being new here- I didn’t need to sacrifice the dreams you had to put on hold

For me, because of me- I’m sorry I wasn’t the girl you groomed me to be

Not the star you hoped and dreamed of me being and sacrificed everything for

Everything I was supposed to be- the fragile legacy i was supposed to carry

I became you

you, but younger

you but never wiser

you, just as imperfect and brash

But i know it’s not enough- i’m not how you want

 and so I leave

My footsteps were so quiet, unassuming

I look into your eyes and see her love for me vanish

But this must be for the best

you know in your soul when it’s time to go

Yet I still do not know

But I do know this

Where the waterfall is infinite

And the lilies still bloom in the nighttime

We watch the same ones bloom and die

I always know you’re watching

The stars will align someday

Maybe we’ll see the same moon

Trying to capture our vivid reflection in the pale moonlight

I hope you know that

My heart is still open for you, the key is right there- ready for you to find