Out Of Control | Teen Ink

Out Of Control

September 14, 2009
By Mad-As-A-Hatter BRONZE, Sioux Falls, South Dakota
Mad-As-A-Hatter BRONZE, Sioux Falls, South Dakota
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

I'm killing myself
I never meant to loose control
Was it really worth it?
It is now too late for me
I've done so much damage
I don't remember how to stop
I'm lost in the black and can't ever come back
What has become of me?
I don't recognize myself
I feel like an alien
I swore I would be done with this
So many times I've repeated that
I find myself deceiving the ones I love
I'm preparing my grave
Death's fingers are creeping closer
Veins so twisted
Blood so distorted
Body so mutilated
There is no deliverance
I'm so beautiful
I'm so dead
I've been separated from the living
The best part I'm the only one who knows
I hate how excellent i am at lying
No one can hear me
Locked in my room
Clutching my pain reliever
Forget the world's existence
The only way I know how to escape
Tomorrow [the pain] will return
I beg for more
God, I want to quit
I hate going through this alone
Sorrow returns to this numb body
Why am I so empty?
I'm so lost
And now I'm dead


The author's comments:
death, pain, lost, drugs, cutting, addiction, control, suicide, depression, love

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