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saturday
It started with a lie,
to people I love.
On that day,
the day it all changed.
How more crystal clear can it be?
I should have told them the truth.
Like ice coffee in the winter,
contradiction after contradiction.
I watch as the auburn leaves fall to the November ground.
Whilst sitting on top of the cold grass
on the small hill by the old library.
It couldn’t be better.
I think.
The world was as cold as it could get,
And the Florida sun was only a painting in my mind now.
Not so long ago we were both in the sun,
The same sun,
but not together.
He was there,
so was I.
Now he’s here,
so am I.
On the day it all changed.
Lost amongst a whirled wind of emotions,
it’s different now but I don’t mind.
It was the day I told myself wouldn’t happen.
The one time thing turned into something else.
Something more,
something better,
something changed.
I didn’t want it to end up like this.
I didn’t want to love him.
I didn’t think I could.
But I do.
But thinking back now
I didn’t know how,
I couldn’t.
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