Eyes flicker away, hiding diamond
Tears—sharp enough to cut my heart
Wide open. Ears fold in on themselves, trying so
Hard to beat away biting remarks
And the harsh tones that my mouth
Can’t seem to stop spouting.

But still I continue.

Faster, faster I speak, spinning you around
On a downward spiral.
And your pain, the hurt I’ve caused you
So many times before,
Gives me sweet satisfaction. Barely aware
Of the warmth that trickles down my
Face. Of the regret in my uneasy
Heart. Until, with a sickening epiphany, I realize
That I’m doing it again.
Soft arms reach out to circle your hard ones, and I
Feel for you.
My entire being soaks in its guilt, wishing
I could suck out your pain.

I am the cause of both our
Tears, and you are the cause of all
My fears.
My brain is working, turning
Its gears
As I try to keep the only thing
I hold dear.