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An Elephant and a Donkey Walk into a Bar
The beautiful elephant shook his magnificent head
Above him his flag shone a deep bloody red
The donkey pawed his foot against the ground
Spinning his blue banner all around
The elephant knew this new animal he would pound
And throw him bodily to the ground
The donkey would kick him till he made the most painful sound
And wear his ivory tusks as an ivory crown
The donkey had won their last major war
But the elephant’s track record showed he had won more
They both wanted to be in charge of their home
After they had kicked out the lion king out of his British roam
On the elephants back an R painted with a hand so sure
A D on the donkeys collected and secure
Old dogs that had learned new tricks
Broken bones from stones and sticks
Their race course now littered with magazines and tabloids
Inside laughing at the many political droids
The race could get dirty with lies and deceit
But the war was just about to take heat
The race could seem like a reality show
With scandals and blaming and “I told you so!”
But it was also patriotic and all for the best
So the people could all enjoy peaceful rest
In this corner we have the mighty elephant with morals and against all sin
Courage and strength filled up to the brim
In this corner we have the brave donkey intelligent and clever
Striving to make things helpful and better
To choose who will win is incredibly heavy
So take your privilege to decide stern and steady
56 percent isn’t enough, it won’t do at all
You must choose who will live in the Presidential Hall
For only one can win this is for sure
A donkey or an elephant it’s all the uproar
One will succeed and one will be beat
And one will sit in the Oval Office seat
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