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React
Scream at my impassive visage.
I won’t react.
I’ll just look right back into your eyes
And challenge you to continue screaming,
Accusing, insulting.
I won’t react
Because you’re waiting for my response.
It will give you some sort of twisted, sadistic pleasure
To see me lose control before you.
You want me to scream;
You’re waiting for me to defend.
I know you so well;
I can read your invisible emotions
And it scares me even though I’ll never admit it.
That crazed look that consumes you
Terrifies me, but I won’t react.
Your threats chill my blood,
But I won’t react.
Don’t say those things to me;
They hurt me, even though you can’t see
The pain that kills me every time you scream
Because I stubbornly refuse to react.
I won’t react before you;
I know how you thrive on my cries.
You can continue screaming,
Abusing, threatening;
I’ll remain impassive.
Of course, you’ll never know
Why I turn my face away from you.
I pretend to admire the monotonous wall
Because it’s witness
To my mute tears.
You don’t need to shove
My pillowcase in the washing machine
Anymore.
I wash it every night
With the saline evidence of my mental aches.
They know; they understand;
They don’t react. The walls,
The pillows, the trees, the grass,
Stare at me as impassively
As I stare at you.
They bear witness
To my clandestine sorrow.
I react before them, because,
In front of you, I refuse to react.
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