I cannot live a lie.
A lie that states,
That I am happy.
I sit in this lonely old rocking chair,
Looking out threw my window,
Watching everyone have fun
And accomplish their life goals.
I sit here and wonder,
Why I can't have the same freedom,
As others.
Why I can't be released,
From the invisible shackles,
That tie myself to this chair.
This chair that stops me.
It stops me from what I want to start.
It stops me from what I want to continue.
And it stops me from what I want to finish.
I am stuck-
Doing the same old thing everyday,
Looking out that window,
Watching those smiling faces have fun,
And show the definition of happy.
While I just sit here,
Masking the face of pain.
With something that I call happy.
Just wishing that I can have,
A glimpse of that feeling once again.
And I can't help but constantly
Sit here thinking-hoping-wishing,
That I'll find that key.
That key will unlock me from these invisible shackle,
And I will be able to free myself from this chair,
And walk with those others that are so joyfully happy,
But probably aren't and are only masking their pain.
But I will not know until I can actually be one of them.